Index of

mation provides communication cues that allow you to gather a tremendous
amount of data about others while networking.
Closed-ended questions require only a yes or no response. Openended
questions maximize information. Consider replacing “Do you
like your work?” with “What do you like most about your work?” Also,
why tends to put the responder on the defensive. Whenever possible,
replace why with how or what. Consider replacing “Why did you leave
your job?” with “What led you to make a career change?”
Th oughtful questions build rapport. Refl ect on a time you met someone
and walked away with a positive impression. Most likely, she demonstrated
an interest in you. Actively listening demonstrates an interest
in others—a slam-dunk to making a good impression yourself.
I overheard the following description of a colleague: “She is reserved,
but has a great deal of depth within her.” I noticed the but. As if it is
contradictory for a reserved person to have depth. I have noticed that
people who initially seem reserved eventually reveal intriguing backgrounds,
talents, and personalities.
Dusty Old Rule #3:
Maximize Time with Others (Party)
Th is advice plays directly into the fi rst precondition for a visa to Extroland:
be social. Extroverts revive their energy by spending lots of time
with lots of people on a regular basis.
In a conversation with an extrovert, I was surprised to hear her
say she enjoyed taking day trips alone. When I asked for details, she
responded, “Sure. I just get on the tour bus and spend the rest of the
day chatt ing with whomever happens to be seated next to me. It’s
great!”
SPARKLING NEW RULES THAT WORK 55