Freshwater

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Part V: The Part of Tens
The Fish Law of Metamorphosis
The fish law of metamorphosis states that any fish in your tank, when given
the right opportunity, will be able to instantly morph into any shape necessary
to escape from the aquarium. Our own fish have morphed into the
shape of a French fry in order to squeeze through an air-line hole.
The second part of this law states that after escape, this same fish will
morph into either a carpet dust ball or a kitty snack. To fix this problem,
make sure that all holes in the top of the tank lid are completely covered,
especially if you have species of fish that are especially prone to jumping
out of aquariums.
The Fish Law of Motion
The fish law of motion states that any sluggish or ill-looking fish will instantly
be able to dash madly at twice the speed of light when a net is inserted into
the aquarium. The fish will always move directly at right angles to the net’s
strategic placement — a maneuver which will leave you with wet clothes, a
lot of frustration, and a torn-up tank.
To avoid this problem, try adding a little food to coax your fish up to the top
of the tank when you need to catch one. Gently lift out large aquarium decorations,
such as rocks, before you attempt to capture your fish. This will provide
you with more space and maneuverability.
The Fish Law of Anti-Matter
The fish law of anti-matter states that fish are the only animals on earth that
are capable of hiding their own body matter after death so that they can
never be found. On a good day, Sherlock Holmes would not be able to find a
dead guppy in a 1-gallon bowl because of this law.
It is important to have good filtration in your tank and carry out frequent
water changes because of this unusual problem. If a dead fish cannot be
located, then a build-up of waste will occur and cause water fouling and
disease.