Konrad and Alexandra (pdf) - Rolf Gross

I could live just as well in Svaneti as in St. Petersburg. Of course, I could learn Georgian, what
is one more language?"
Alexandra smiled contemptuously. "You know yourself that your inheritance might be
destroyed overnight by that glorious revolution we so eagerly hope for. What then? Are you
ready to write revolutionary pamphlets? You are honest but naïve!"
He got a red face and flared up. "I will never prostitute myself to write propaganda or
political slogans, certainly not for the Socialists."
She pointed at him. "Well, there you are! I could at least care for the victims of such an
upheaval. What would you do? Emigrate to Europe if that happens? With this mountain
woman? I have carefully examined the possible scenarios in my mind and in practice. I will not
flee to the relative safety of Western Europe. I will stay here. But I can afford it with a
reasonable amount of willpower and determination. I might have to send Otto to Germany, he
is half-German. I have no right to tie him to my fate. Konrad will not desert me."
He sighed. "I can see that you are serious, but it is hard for me to face this kind of bare
reality. I am not afraid to lose my life, but you are right, what to do if I survive? How did you
learn to live every day in such high spirits? How can you look into the face of the worst possible
future without getting depressed? I know the answer you will give me, extrovert your fears and
anxieties! That’s what you do! But I was not born with a soul as tough as yours."
His eyes were pleading. Alexandra felt touched. "I once promised to be your muse on
the path of finding yourself. My powers are limited. My commitment to Konrad preempted them.
Maybe Tamara is the woman who could rescue you from your vacillating indecision, your
greatest handicap. Maybe she could inspire your writing and mediate reality."
She shook her head. "But you should not propose to Tamara or ask her father for her
hand now. Her parents like you, but you would violate their conservative formality."
She paused pensively. "Maybe I could invite Tamara to St. Petersburg. There you could
discuss all these questions with her. She could acquire some professional education in St.
Petersburg on which she could survive without you if necessary. Let me think about that."
Vladimir took her hand and kissed it passionately. Alexandra’s knees weakened, and
she quickly ended their conversation.
Later, at night in presence of her parents Alexandra invited Tamara to stay with them in
St. Petersburg for a few months and see what the world outside of Georgia looked like.
Tamara, who was not indifferent to Vladimir’s attention, caught on to Alexandra’s offer with
enthusiasm.
Her father suggested that he might even send her to St. Petersburg to finish her
education. With her competent cousin as mentor and chaperone this looked quite conceivable
to him. Would Alexandra advise them in such an undertaking? He had been much impressed
by Alexandra’s single-minded effort in becoming a medical doctor.
Alexandra, chose her words carefully. Tamara would have to work hard, but the benefits
of a professional education in these uncertain times were obvious. Tamara had already
finished four years at St. Nino’s College for Girls in Tiflis with good grades.
"Well, I feel almost embarrassed by being an accomplice to this conspiracy," said
Alexandra to Vladimir that night. "Before the law one calls this pimping! But you are lucky, her
father guessed what is going on between you and Tamara, and he likes you. I will be held
responsible for protecting Tamara’s innocence!"
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