Konrad and Alexandra (pdf) - Rolf Gross

Revolutionary St. Petersburg
Winter 1913 – 1914
On his China trip Konrad had let his beard grow, not the wild, untamed one he had
previously had, but a well-trimmed, civilized beard. It had turned out white. With his copious
brown hair turning gray at the temples he looked dashingly elegant. Helena, who had long had
a crush on Konrad, "fell in love" with him, as she said.
Alexandra, feeling that she had abandoned Konrad in too brusque a manner, had asked
Helena to occasionally visit Konrad while she was away. Thus Konrad found himself in the
company of an adoring, striking woman.
He invited Helena to dinner with Vitali Alekseev and El-Zafaran, to whom he owed a
report on his searches for the Sufi and Ch’an. Konrad introduced El-Zafaran with a taunting
smile, not as a Sufi sheikh, but as Doctor of Comparative Languages, which quickly dispelled
the initial formality. El-Zafaran laughed, he shouldn't have sent Konrad to Ramitani who would
uncover all his well-kept secrets. But then he showed his most relaxed and humorous side,
excited by the new insights Konrad brought back. Jovial Alexeev meanwhile entertained
Helena with funny anecdotes about famous, impractical M. le Professeur Chavannes, with
whom he had traveled in China.
In the evenings, seeking a warm family atmosphere, Helena had often cooked dinner for
Konrad and helped him and Otto with their grand project for Alexandra’s birthday: a diary of
Konrad’s Chinese travels collated from his notes, letters, and drawings. Otto painstakingly
drew the maps and occasionally copied Konrad’s notes.
One evening Helena confided to Konrad that Alekseev had invited her to dinner. She blushed
deeply, he was a most congenial and charming man.
These idyllic days without Alexandra had been rudely interrupted when Tamara arrived
in St. Petersburg breathing fire. "You have no idea how narrow-minded Georgian fathers are.
Irakli’s love for Alexandra is downright incestuous. Konrad, you never had to fight for
Alexandra."
She was now visibly pregnant. Konrad found her insufferable and to top it all off, Otto,
who hung on Tamara’s every word, asked, "Papa, what is incestuous love?" Pained and
embarrassed, Konrad explained to him that incest was an overwhelming love of a father for his
daughter. Because they were closely related, such a love was forbidden.
Tamara shouted. "I am no longer a child, I will do what I think is right, and not what
convention decrees. When I said that, my father slapped me. It was an ugly scene. I am sorry it
happened in Irakli’s house. Irakli, who had tried everything in his power to change my father’s
mind, had to witness that scene. I will never forgive my father!"
She put her head on the table and cried in fits. "I love my parents, I always loved my
father dearly. I was proud of him. All of that has been destroyed by his intransigence. I lost not
only him but my entire family."
Vladimir tried to stroke her hair. She reared her head and shoock her abundant mane.
"Leave me alone. You are as arch-conservative as my father, and you got me pregnant."
She had another attack of hysterical sobs. "You never support my political aspirations,
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