Final Version May 5 07

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without walls, the teacher called me aside to give me an individual program different
from my peers. This was not punishment but recognition of an independent style that
benefited from active involvement in learning. I can remember writing a screenplay,
editing a newspaper, and performing excerpts from Shakespeare; the influence on my
sense of self was profound. For the first time, I felt what it was like to have voice.
Entering junior high school in grade seven after this open education experience
was shocking. I entered a walled environment of lecture, homework, punishment, and
tests. As a female student, I found the expression of voice was stifled, especially by male
teachers. The teacher once again assumed a position in front of the classroom, controlling
the power and owning the curriculum. As an outcome of feeling silenced, I became
outspoken. I resented the teacher as authority figure. I was argumentative and talkative
during lessons. In spite of high marks, I was no longer seen as capable and creative. I was
called impetuous and outspoken. In retrospect, I realize that I felt compelled to use my
voice in retaliation for the teacher’s failure to share voice.
High school and university.
In high school, I became increasingly restless with the continued diminished
opportunities for expression available to me. I would argue whenever given the chance,
and if none existed, talk incessantly with my peers during lectures. Taylor, Gilligan, and
Sullivan (1995) examined voice in the lives of girls and women and found that outspoken
girls considered to have a big mouth often get into trouble, “but silence, the slow slipping
into a kind of invisible isolation,” is equally devastating for those girls and women who
choose not to speak up (p. 3).