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Contents Cover Title Page Copyright Immorality Act, 1927 Part I Chapter 1: Run Chapter 2: Born a Crime Chapter 3: Trevor, Pray Chapter 4: Chameleon Chapter 5: The Second Girl Chapter 6: Loopholes Chapter 7: Fufi Chapter 8: Robert Part II Chapter 9: The Mulberry Tree Chapter 10: A Young Man’s Long, Awkward, Occasionally Tragic, and Frequently Humiliating Education in Affairs of the Heart, Part I: Valentine’s Day Chapter 11: Outsider Chapter 12: A Young Man’s Long, Awkward, Occasionally Tragic, and Frequently Humiliating Education in Affairs of the Heart, Part II: The Crush Chapter 13: Colorblind Chapter 14: A Young Man’s Long, Awkward, Occasionally Tragic, and Frequently Humiliating Education in Affairs of the Heart, Part III: The Dance Part III Chapter 15: Go Hitler! Chapter 16: The Cheese Boys Chapter 17: The World Doesn’t Love You Chapter 18: My Mother’s Life Dedication Acknowledgments About the Author
IMMORALITY ACT, 1927 To prohibit illicit carnal intercourse between Europeans and natives and other acts in relation thereto. B E IT ENACTED by the King’s Most Excellent Majesty, the Senate and the House of Assembly of the Union of South Africa, as follows:— 1. Any European male who has illicit carnal intercourse with a native female, and any native male who has illicit carnal intercourse with a European female…shall be guilty of an offence and liable on conviction to imprisonment for a period not exceeding five years. 2. Any native female who permits any European male to have illicit carnal intercourse with her and any European female who permits any native male to have illicit carnal intercourse with her shall be guilty of an offence and liable on conviction to imprisonment for a period not exceeding four years….
Page 3: Copyright © 2016 by Trevor Noah Al
Page 8 and 9: RUN Sometimes in big Hollywood movi
Page 10 and 11: like bouncers at a club, and hold t
Page 12 and 13: failed her she’d use her wits. If
Page 14 and 15: you stealing our customers? Why are
Page 16 and 17: there, this little boy and his mom,
Page 18 and 19: BORN A CRIME I grew up in South Afr
Page 20 and 21: Many of the prostitutes in town wer
Page 22 and 23: he hadn’t, but once I existed he
Page 24 and 25: Traveling around the world today, I
Page 26 and 27: TREVOR, PRAY I grew up in a world r
Page 28 and 29: That’s all she did, all day, ever
Page 30 and 31: speakeasy. The shebeens were where
Page 32 and 33: using sonar. Every time she called
Page 34 and 35: praying continued. It went on for s
Page 36 and 37: CHAMELEON One afternoon I was playi
Page 38 and 39: As a kid I understood that people w
Page 40 and 41: was an ocean of black, like someone
Page 42 and 43: Before apartheid, any black South A
Page 44 and 45: and uncles had gone off to the citi
Page 46 and 47: through those. My books were my pri
Page 48 and 49: If we weren’t at school or work o
Page 50 and 51: Apartheid, for all its power, had f
Page 52 and 53: at school used overhead projectors
Page 54 and 55:
She shrugged again. “So sad. I ho
Page 56 and 57:
“What?” “Look, did you or did
Page 58 and 59:
When I was seven years old, my moth
Page 60 and 61:
I grew up in a black family in a bl
Page 62 and 63:
oth. She brought them home, and I w
Page 64 and 65:
They went back and forth. This woma
Page 66 and 67:
ROBERT My father is a complete myst
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dad’s, where we’d watch Formula
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A bottle of Sprite. Custard with ca
Page 73 and 74:
W hen Dutch colonists landed at the
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your grandfather couldn’t keep hi
Page 77 and 78:
Things like that happened a lot. I
Page 79 and 80:
Revenge truly is sweet. It takes yo
Page 82 and 83:
A YOUNG MAN’S LONG, AWKWARD, OCCA
Page 84 and 85:
Valentine’s card and the flowers
Page 86 and 87:
OUTSIDER After finishing primary sc
Page 88 and 89:
work for it—and I still get my br
Page 91 and 92:
Page 93 and 94:
me the digits one by one as I wrote
Page 95 and 96:
COLORBLIND At Sandringham I got to
Page 97 and 98:
pedestrian out for a stroll. Once I
Page 99 and 100:
“Is it David?” “No.” “Ria
Page 102 and 103:
Page 104 and 105:
I got up onstage and Tom did some t
Page 106 and 107:
There was a red Mazda that we’d h
Page 108 and 109:
hair and started painting this crea
Page 110 and 111:
“Are you ready?” I said. “Let
Page 112:
I’d been dating a girl for over a
Page 115 and 116:
GO HITLER! When I was in grade nine
Page 117 and 118:
Business was booming. By matric I w
Page 119 and 120:
Back then, most DJs could spin for
Page 121 and 122:
someone must be the toughest guy of
Page 123 and 124:
My mind was racing, trying to figur
Page 125 and 126:
THE CHEESE BOYS My friend Bongani w
Page 127 and 128:
settlement going on. Third, Fourth,
Page 129 and 130:
In the hood, even if you’re not a
Page 131 and 132:
“But who did this belong to?” I
Page 133 and 134:
“Hey, let’s make a deal. We’l
Page 135 and 136:
Everyone must know that your succes
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e a whole lot harder for an investm
Page 139 and 140:
O nce, when I was ten years old, vi
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lesson, and now that lesson is the
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me aside and told me what I was in
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first night, everyone was giving me
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couldn’t afford anything but a st
Page 149 and 150:
“I-I’m not fine, Your Honor. I
Page 151 and 152:
M y favorite thing to eat as a kid,
Page 153 and 154:
could lift car engines and gearboxe
Page 155 and 156:
Xhosa woman no less, a culture whos
Page 157 and 158:
“Respect?! You almost burned down
Page 159 and 160:
She gives and gives and gives; that
Page 161 and 162:
on it as well. Clients were getting
Page 163 and 164:
Bramley, three neighborhoods away,
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wouldn’t happen again, but it was
Page 167 and 168:
“This is all I can do,” she sai
Page 169 and 170:
“Where are you now?” I said.
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times he pulled the trigger, and fo
Page 173 and 174:
emergency room to give us an update
Page 175 and 176:
W hen my mother was shot, so much h
Page 177 and 178:
For my mother. My first fan. Thank
Page 179 and 180:
ABOUT THE AUTHOR TREVOR NOAH is a c
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