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Making Your First Million.pdf - Association of Net Entrepreneurs and ...

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<strong>Making</strong> <strong>Your</strong> <strong>First</strong> <strong>Million</strong><br />

Bob introduced himself <strong>and</strong> asked if I'd like to visit an AA. meeting the following night<br />

<strong>and</strong> it was here I had a brainwave. If I pretended to be an alcoholic I could polish up my<br />

halo, win my wife's affections <strong>and</strong> still drink. A real win-win situation. "You bet!" I<br />

blurted out, then realizing I may have sounded overly eager, added absent-mindedly: "I<br />

wouldn't mind finding out if I'm really an alcoholic or not."<br />

The following night Bob took me to the city group meeting. A real bunch <strong>of</strong> losers, but it<br />

didn't matter. I was on my mission I hung out trying not to look too cool <strong>and</strong> Rolf rushed<br />

up to me, pumped my h<strong>and</strong> <strong>and</strong> said: "Hang in there mate. It'll get better." And I thought:<br />

"It'll want to. Who is this loser? Leave me alone. Go irrigate your colon." Another dude<br />

I'd never seen before introduced himself as Ernie (the garden gnome) <strong>and</strong> said: "If you<br />

don't pick up the first drink you can't get drunk." I began to wonder if I'd hit a Ken <strong>and</strong><br />

Barbie on Prozac convention. But I hung in there. I was on a mission after all: Polish up<br />

the halo, win the wife's affections back, try not to look too good. I had, after all<br />

developed a cool <strong>and</strong> tough exterior. Years <strong>of</strong> insecurity had built a tough wall around me<br />

<strong>and</strong> the bricks in the wall were pride, alo<strong>of</strong>ness, conceit, power, wealth, possessions,<br />

achievements, talent. I was not about to let anyone break through.<br />

For seven weeks I polished the halo, attending AA regularly, working on my secret<br />

mission. My pride kept me sober. I knew I was not an alcoholic <strong>and</strong> in my way I was<br />

setting about proving it. On the fifth <strong>of</strong> October Bernie arrived to take me to lunch. Our<br />

favorite watering hole, the Beach Hotel overlooking the Pacific Ocean. The ideal place,<br />

now that Lloyds had been blown down in a storm, for masters <strong>of</strong> the universe to voice<br />

their dreams. Lunch at Lloyds had <strong>of</strong>ten degenerated into a fifteen hour session <strong>and</strong> it was<br />

sad to see it washed into the ocean.<br />

"Why are you going to AA. George? You're not an alcoholic. I mean, look at yourself,<br />

you don't even drink as much as me!"<br />

"That's true." I liked Bernie. He's a very perceptive person <strong>and</strong> I began to wonder if he<br />

could see through my scheme.<br />

"You're only going along to win that bitch <strong>of</strong> a wife back!" Bernie was clearly still<br />

smarting from the two glasses <strong>of</strong> wine she'd thrown over him at the Arts Ball the March<br />

before, he <strong>of</strong> course, remaining the very soul <strong>of</strong> gentlemanly propriety, patting himself<br />

down with his h<strong>and</strong>kerchief, continuing on in cultured tones as she railed <strong>and</strong> ranted.<br />

I grinned sheepishly. "I could never fool you for long Bernie. Yeah. I'm doing the<br />

prodigal son bit. I've always said it's better to ask forgiveness than permission so I'm<br />

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