Complete Idiot's Guide to Conquering Fear and Anxiety

Page 230Roots of High AnxietyDid you score in the high anxiety range? If so, you might wonder why. Perhaps you have overwhelming challenges in your life. Perhaps you were mistreated as a child.Actually, though these variables get factored into the GAD pool, the primary underlying reason that you are a nervous wreck comes from the gene pool.Nervous GenesAs we've discussed in previous chapters, some people are born destined to live with thorny anxiety. Sensitive and emotional, negative signals are picked up soonerand elicit stronger reactions. If you're born with this trait, called behavioral inhibition, emotional sensitivity or harm avoidance, incessant fret and worry are hard­wiredinto your brain and you are naturally apprehensive, fearful, prone to worry, nervous, tense, and jittery.You are not a wimp or a loser. Through no fault of your own, you live at the mercy of a nervous system set to jump at the slightest provocation:Physical: You may startle easily to noise and feel bothered by bright or flashing lighting, odors, crowds, heights, certain textures on your skin, or light or unexpectedtouch.Emotional: You may be quick to perceive others as hostile, disapproving, or disinterested.Mental: You excessively worry about your own safety and that of those close to you.When you tell people your worries, they often tell you to just "Chill out," "Get over it," "Stop worrying so much." Unfortunately, this is not easy. Once agitated, nervoustypes are less able to self­soothe than hardier, less excitable people.Psychic WarsInborn sensitivity and harm avoidance does not necessarily make for an unhappy life. If you were born into a protective environment, of sensitive parents who wipedyour tears away and made you feel safe from danger while at the same time nudging you forward, your tendency to react strongly was dampened and you didn't get aseasily out of control. Eventually your mother's soothing was internalized, enabling you to wipe your own tears and to protect yourself from overwhelming anxiety. As aperson, you remain slow­to­warm to new people and situations and prone to negative emotions, but feel inwardly secure and able to enjoy life and healthyrelationships. Moreover, your ability to discern greater nuances in your world makes you more creative, in tune with others, and deep thinking.