No Longer Human ( PDFDrive )

146
I said, "You don't seem to be very interested in
crime."
"That's right. I'm not a criminal like you. I may
indulge myself with a little dissipation, but I don't
cause women to die, and I don't lift money from them
either."
The voice of a resistance weak but desperate
spoke from somewhere in my heart. It said that I had
not caused anyone to die, that I had not lifted money
from anyone—but once again the ingrained habit of
considering myself evil took command.
It is quite impossible for me to contradict anyone
to his face. I struggled with all my might to control
the feelings which mounted more dangerously in
me with each instant, the result of the depressing
effects of the gin. Finally I muttered almost to myself,
"Actions punishable by jail sentences are not the only
crimes. If we knew the antonym of crime, I think we
would know its true nature. Cod . . . salvation . . .
love . . . light. But for Cod there is the antonym
Satan, for salvation there is perdition, for love there
is hate, for light there is darkness, for good, evil.
Crime and prayer? Crime and repentance? Crime and
confession? Crime and ... no, they're all synonymous.
What is the opposite of crime?"
"Well if you spell 'crime' backwards—no, that
doesn't make sense. But the word does contain the