No Longer Human ( PDFDrive )

154
have hidden it here at some time or other in the past
when I felt I might need it, after first scratching off
the label. The poor child could not read Western
letters, and I must have thought it was enough if I
just scratched off with my nails the part of the label
in Japanese. (You have committed no sin.)
I very quietly filled a glass with water, careful
not to make the least noise, and deliberately broke
the seal of the box. I poured the whole contents into
my mouth. I calmly drained the glass of water in
one gulp. I switched off the light and went to bed at
once.
For three days and nights I lay as one dead. The
doctor considered it an accident, and was kind enough
to postpone reporting to the police. I am told that
the first words I murmured as I began to recover
consciousness were, "I'm going home." It's not clear
even to myself what place I meant by "home," but
in any case these were the words I said, accompanied,
I was told, by profuse weeping.
Gradually the fog cleared, and when I regained
consciousness there was Flatfish sitting at my pillow, a
most unpleasant expression on his face.
"The last time was also at the end of t lie year,
wasn't it? He always chooses the end of the year, just
when everybody is frantically busy. He'll prove the
death of me if he keeps on doing such things."