THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY Ambrose Bierce - Sunny Hills High School

anthropoid poets.
Ambrose Bierce The Devil’s Dictionary
HUMORIST, n. A plague that would have softened down the hoar
austerity of Pharaoh's heart and persuaded him to dismiss Israel with
his best wishes, cat‐quick.
Lo! the poor humorist, whose tortured mind
See jokes in crowds, though still to gloom inclined‐‐
Whose simple appetite, untaught to stray,
His brains, renewed by night, consumes by day.
He thinks, admitted to an equal sty,
A graceful hog would bear his company.
Alexander Poke
HURRICANE, n. An atmospheric demonstration once very common but now
generally abandoned for the tornado and cyclone. The hurricane is
still in popular use in the West Indies and is preferred by certain
old‐fashioned sea‐captains. It is also used in the construction of
the upper decks of steamboats, but generally speaking, the hurricane's
usefulness has outlasted it.
HURRY, n. The dispatch of bunglers.
Page | 145