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THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY Ambrose Bierce - Sunny Hills High School

THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY Ambrose Bierce - Sunny Hills High School

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<strong>Ambrose</strong> <strong>Bierce</strong> The Devil’s Dictionary<br />

ZANZIBARI, n. An inhabitant of the Sultanate of Zanzibar, off the<br />

eastern coast of Africa. The Zanzibaris, a warlike people, are best<br />

known in this country through a threatening diplomatic incident that<br />

occurred a few years ago. The American consul at the capital occupied<br />

a dwelling that faced the sea, with a sandy beach between. Greatly to<br />

the scandal of this official's family, and against repeated<br />

remonstrances of the official himself, the people of the city<br />

persisted in using the beach for bathing. One day a woman came down<br />

to the edge of the water and was stooping to remove her attire (a pair<br />

of sandals) when the consul, incensed beyond restraint, fired a charge<br />

of bird‐shot into the most conspicuous part of her person.<br />

Unfortunately for the existing _entente cordiale_ between two great<br />

nations, she was the Sultana.<br />

ZEAL, n. A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and<br />

inexperienced. A passion that goeth before a sprawl.<br />

When Zeal sought Gratitude for his reward<br />

He went away exclaiming: "O my Lord!"<br />

"What do you want?" the Lord asked, bending down.<br />

"An ointment for my cracked and bleeding crown."<br />

Jum Coople<br />

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