Backfire - Spander Files

“I’m proud of you,” Spike told Xander with unusual kindness in his blue eyes.
“Fuck you.”
“I mean because you didn’t break. You’re still you, I can see it.”
“Nothing to break,” Xander glared at Spike. “Was already broken.”
Spike stood up and wrapped his blood-stained arms around Xander’s sticky body.
“No, you weren’t. You’re my Xander. One hundred percent whole.”
Xander pushed Spike away. “You don’t know me.”
Spike embraced him again, a tighter painful hold. “I know you. Always have,
always will. You’re me. And you won’t break. Ever.” He came forward and placed
a small kiss on Xander’s lips, then leaned up slightly and kissed his cheek in the
same way.
His lips stayed on Xander’s cheek and licked there for a minute. Xander let it
happen until he realized that Spike was healing the split skin. He pushed Spike
away again, a part of him wanting to keep the scar that the small gash would create,
although he refused to acknowledge why.
As Xander began the long journey toward the bathroom, Spike tried to put an arm
around his waist, but Xander wiggled away from him, so the vampire simply
walked behind him, a hand coming up to steady him when it looked like Xander
was about to fall again.
When they made it to the shower, Xander made a minor attempt to tell Spike that he
would rather bathe alone, but the stern look on Spike’s face stopped him. By the
time Xander was standing under the hard spray of water, one hand on the wall, the
other on Spike’s shoulder, he finally found words to say, “I’m not you.”
“More than you know, luv.”
“I will break…if he does it again.”