CHECK Magazin - Gesundheitsmagazin für Männer No.4

PSYCHOLOGY
Those who don’t conform to the norm seem to be looking in vain for affirmation.
Therefore, gays and trans men often have to fight harder than their heterosexual
counterparts to maintain a healthy self-confidence and natural optimism isn’t a
given in their personal development. After all, you have learned that rejection is the
rule and not the exception.
But optimism is a very decisive factor in life: a positive attitude brings more joy in
everyday life, fun at work, social contacts and a more fulfilling life. Some even claim
that with positive thinking one can magnetically attract happiness. - Here are our
eight tips on how you can learn optimism and bring it into your everyday life. (ts,sw)
4. APPRECIATE THE LITTLE THINGS
Do you know the feeling of never achieving
anything? No matter what: it always has to be
“higher, faster, better”. Pressures of that kind
can push even the most skillful optimist to
their limits.Try and be happy about the little
things in everyday life: Great, it‘s not raining
today! A hot guy smiled at me on the train -
YAY! The neighbor‘s dog wagged his tail when
it saw me - how beautiful! It may sound trite,
but it is also true: Life is too short to wait for
big fortune to come knocking at your door. And
it’s the little joys that show you the way there.
5. WRITE A HAPPINESS DIARY
If you‘re having a hard time enjoying the little
things, try a happiness journal. Every evening
you write down what went well during the day,
what made you smile, or what you are grateful
for. Take these minutes to become more
aware of the positive events of the day. How
often do you get annoyed for days about some
stupid comment somebody made. But the one
complement in the morning is already forgotten
at lunch. Your happiness diary will become
your private space in which you can train your
optimism and find it again at any time.
6. SHARE YOUR JOY
Hand on your heart: when someone asks you
how your day was, what do you say first? Are
you talking about the bus door that was shut
in your face? The guy who blocked you on
Grindr? Or about something beautiful that
happened to you? In our world, it‘s perfectly
normal to vent your anger and get upset.
However, it is much less common to report
positive experiences. Tell your friends about
how someone smiled nicely at you today. The
positive energy immediately changes your
dynamics and you are all better off.
7. SMILE
Now it‘s getting a bit scientific: To learn optimism,
you can trick your brain a little. When
we smile, the brain gets the message that we
are happy. This has to do with the muscles in
the face, which cause your nervous system to
produce certain messenger substances that
put you in a good mood. So, next time you‘re in
a bad mood, just smile and see what happens.
8. USE POSITIVE PHRASING
Another trick, but a more psychological one:
the way you communicate with yourself and
formulate goals can certainly promote your
optimism. Words of negation - like no or never
- don’t have a strong emotional connotation.
Therefore, your mind may find these words
unimportant. So if you say, „I‘m not getting
upset about it now,“ you may be doing just that
because upset is the strong emotional word
recognised by your mind. Try rather say: „I am
totally calm now.“
CHECK | AUSGABE 4
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