Australian Tales - Setis

thankless office. Of course he told his wife all about the rupture when he
returned home from his unsuccessful missions, and his wife told her
grown-up children, so by a natural process, the petty brawlings of Mr.
and Mrs. Glumps were soon as public as other sporting intelligence, and
the poor old pair were the table-talk of all the vulgar gossips in town.
“I wish I could have the privilege of speaking to the world for even
half-an-hour before I die, Mr. Boomerang,” said Mr. Dovecott, with
earnestness. “Among many important items from my long experience in
the world's ways that I could quote, I would say to young folks who are
on the look out for partners in life, or rather I would say to their natural
guardians, for they are most responsible, ‘Be careful that there are no
striking disparities between these inexperienced lovers, or they cannot
reasonably expect conjugal happiness. Above all, see that virtuous
principles are alive in their hearts, for where they are lacking, the
consequences may be anything that your imagination can picture that is
dreadful.’ A moment's sad reflection on passing events is sufficient to
convince us of that, Mr. Boomerang. Let your fancy picture a youthful
pair tripping jauntily up to the altar in God's house, to be united in holy
wedlock, and while the bridegroom is promising to love, honour, and
cherish the blooming girl whose hand he clasps, just conceive, sir, that it
is awfully possible, that in less than twelve months' time he will go home
drunk, beat his wife savagely, and throw her bridal wreath of orange
blossoms behind the fire. Ay, more horrible still, that in less than five
years hence he will murder her. It is a frightful conception, sir, but true to
life. Alas! it is true to life in our very midst. Where virtue is not the
guiding principle of the heart, the Devil rules supreme; and what limit is
there to his power for evil?
“Then I would say to young newly-married folks,” continued Mr.
Dovecott, “ ‘You are setting out together on a toilsome journey, friends,
and whether it be a long or a short one to you, it is for life; so you had
better arrange the cushions in your travelling car so as to prevent bumps
and bruises by the way. In other words, you had better begin at once to
study each other's tempers and dispositions, and be resolved to mutually
yield where principle does not imperatively forbid you. Set up God's altar
in your household and take God's word for your guide, and you will be
happy.’
“To old folks who are tottering down the hill of life, and throwing glass
bottles and sharp pebbles in each other's pathways, I would say, ‘Friends,
sit down a-bit, and listen to reason. Apart from the sin of your acts, they
are irrational, as you must admit if you reflect even for a minute. How
much wiser it would be for you to smooth each other's way and jog along
comfortably — to be mutual helps instead of hindrances. What cripple is
so impolitic as to whittle his crutches, and thus weaken or destroy his
only means of moving about? Surely none but an idiot would do that.