Australian Tales - Setis

possession of his house, with a new housekeeper. After hearing various
items of local news, he asked his friend, “And what has become of that
little rogue that jilted me so mysteriously? Ha, ha, ha! The mischievous
young puss! it's a mercy she did not kill me.”
“She was married, seven months ago, to a steady young fellow named
Spry, a clever mechanic,” replied Mr. Grouts.
“I am very glad of that; poor little bird! very glad indeed. I hope she
will be happy. She was far too young for me, Grouts, and I ought to have
known that; but the fact is, I was struck spoony as they call it, and
common sense deserted me. I have often thought of your kindness in
trying to dissuade me from the silly step, and I thank you Grouts; though
I verily believe that all the friends I have in the world would not have
reasoned me out of it at the time; I was so obstinately in love. Ha, ha, ha!
What a silly old gander I was to be sure. But tell me why she gave me up
so suddenly, Grouts? you see I am sane upon the subject now, so you
need not mind telling me all that you know. I received half-a-dozen lines
from Mrs. Mayberry, on my wedding morning, telling me ‘that she had
sent Kitty into the country, and that she would rather bury her in the wild
bush, than give her away to a good-for-nothing old cripple, who regarded
her as a mere brick.’ That's all I know about it, and it's all a mystery to
me.”
Mr. Grouts then briefly explained to his friend the ruse he had invented
to prevent a match, which he saw must end in misery, knowing, as he
did, that Kitty was a giddy little creature, who could only be managed by
a smart young husband; and, moreover, knowing that she was in love
with Ben Spry, more than she was, perhaps, aware of herself. “Finding
all my logic ineffectual,” said Mr. Grouts, “I had recourse to the scheme
which I have explained.”
“But how and when did you manage it? It seems like a piece of
conjuration,” said Mr. Gummy, while tears of fun rolled down his merry
old face.
“While you went down to the door with Mrs. Fitz's physic, I took out
my pencil and wrote ‘salve for sore legs’ on your pomatum pot, and that
is all I did. I intended that Mrs. Mayberry should see it, for I knew it
would blister her pride in a minute; but I was saved further trouble by her
prying curiosity and Mrs. Budge's tattling tongue together. They
managed the rest of the business for me, and that is how you lost your
little spring lamb, Jabez. But I have explained the matter to Mrs.
Mayberry long ago, and I expect she will call on you, and humbly
apologise for her rudeness. For my part, I confess it was a great liberty I
took with you, which nothing but the extreme necessity could warrant,
and I ask you to forgive me, Gummy.”
“Forgive you, my boy! I thank you with all my heart,” said Jabez,
seizing his friend's hand. “You have not only saved me and that poor girl