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3. By Ihis time old Kelly was feeling half sober;
The ghost left and right his two can-hooks did fly.
He fell down on his knees, with his face like soft cheese:
"Will ye call off the fight while Tlook for me eyes?"
When the figure moved off and the fight it was ended,
Old Kelly, half stunned, put his hat on his head.
He crawled to the door and did humbly implore
For his wife to assist him upstairs to his bed.
4. He then told his wife how he fought with a stranger,
So strong as a bull, yet a girl almost,
She then told her husband his wonderful danger:
She says, "Maurice. me man, you've been fighting a ghost!"
'Twas Kelly's wife dressed up in white to keep him from drinking;
She gave him a beating and left him for dead,
And he got such a fright he won't stir after night,
But right after supper goes--(spoken) Where do you guess?
straight off to bed.
The second monologue revolves around Ihe popular joke motif of "heaven entered by
trick," and still shows S1. Peter never more compassionate than for "martyred" husbands.
In "The Lobster Salad." a life-loving Newfoundlander relates his dream the night following
a copious meal of lobster, beer and wine. He is standing by heaven's gate, but turned out
on account of his recent gluttony. Other unhappy candidates include a Jew. trying to coax
51. Peter into Jelling him go back to earth to fetch a coat, an old maid, and "a son of old Er­
i-ann's Isle" arriving with a gracious smile but no pass. The clever Irishman has time to
throw his hat inside the gale. and only let in to get it back. locks the saint Ollt, and trades
the key for a promise to set old Ireland free.!
Priests and ministers, revered in life. receive proportionate treatment in jokes:
There was a Irishman one time and he had a horse for sale. So, anyway,
the priest come along. He said, "anybody buy a horse?" "Yes," he said,
"Pat, I do, I wants a horse." "Alright!" "Is he any good?" "Oh, able to
haul the devil," he said. "the horse is." Right away, he sold the horse, not
too long after, he met that fellow, that priest coming up the hill, the
minister 'long with 'no The horse couldn't haul the two of 'em. Up to.
one of 'em had to gel off. Anyway. met Pat, he said. "Pal, I ttrought you
told me that this horse could haul the deviL" "Yes, Father," I said, "I told
yOLl he could haul the devil. I didn't tell you to haul two."2
1K. Goldstcin, Recitations 15; on the same motif, see also MUNR.A ms 68-16, p. R (AT 1539)
and MUNFLA Q 68-446, p. 6-7 (AT 330*); both referenccs are cxtractcd from Dr. Hcrbert
Halpcrt and Dr. Widdowson's ficldnoles and annotations with kind permission.
2MUNFLA 72-51/C1175.