divine-mercy-in-my-soul

16 It was during the octave of Corpus Christi [June 25, 1925]. God filled my soul with the
interior light of a deeper knowledge of Him as Supreme goodness and Supreme Beauty.
I came to know how very much God loves me. Eternal is His love for me. It was at
vespers – in simple words, which flowed from the heart, I made to God (6) a vow of
perpetual chastity. From that moment I felt a greater intimacy with God, my Spouse.
From that moment I set up a little cell in my heart where I always kept company with
Jesus.
17 At last the time came when the door of the convent was opened for me – it was the first
of August [1925], in the evening, the vigil [of the feast] of Our Lady of the Angels. I felt
immensely happy; it seemed to me that I had stepped into the life of Paradise. A single
prayer was bursting forth from my heart, one of thanksgiving.
18 However, after three weeks I became aware that there is so very little time here for
prayer, and of many other things which spoke to my soul in favor of entering a religious
community of a stricter observance. This thought took a firm hold of my soul, but the
will of God was not in it. Still, the thought, or rather the temptation, was growing
stronger and stronger to the point where I decided one day to announce my departure
to Mother Superior and definitely to leave [the convent]. But God arranged the
circumstances in such a way that I could not get to the Mother Superior [Michael]. I
stepped into the little chapel 7 before going to bed, and I asked Jesus for light in this
matter. But I received nothing in my soul except a strange unrest which I did not
understand. But, in spite of everything, I made up my mind to approach Mother
Superior the next morning right after Mass and tell her of my decision.
19 I came to my cell. The sisters were already in bed – the lights were out. I entered the
cell full of anguish and discontent; I did not know what to do with myself. I threw myself
headlong on the ground and began to pray fervently that I might come to know the will
of God. There is silence everywhere as in the tabernacle. All the sisters are resting like
white hosts enclosed in Jesus‟ chalice. It is only from my cell that God can hear the
moaning of a soul. I did not know that one was not allowed to pray in the cell after nine
without permission. 8
After a while a brightness filled my cell, and on the curtain I saw the very sorrowful Face
of Jesus. There were open wounds on His Face, and large tears were falling on my
bedspread. Not knowing what all this meant, I asked Jesus, “Jesus, who has hurt You
so?” And Jesus said to me, It is you who will cause Me this pain if you leave this
convent. It is to this place that I called you and nowhere else; and I have prepared
many graces for you. I begged pardon of Jesus and immediately changed my decision.
(7) The next day was confession day. I related all that had taken place in my soul, and
the confess\or answered that, from this, God‟s will is clear that I am to remain in this
congregation and that I‟m not even to think of another religious order. From that moment
on, I have always felt happy and content.
20 Shortly after this, I fell ill [general exhaustion]. The dear Mother Superior sent me with
two other sisters for a rest to Skolimow, not far from Warsaw. It was at that time that I
asked the Lord for whom else should I pray for. Jesus said that on the following night He
would let me know for whom I should pray.
28