divine-mercy-in-my-soul

“Sister, let‟s make an end of this illness once and for all, one way or another. You‟ll have to
undergo regular treatment or something. Things can‟t go on like this any longer.” A little
later when I was alone I said, “Christ, what am I to do? Am I to ask You for health or for
death?” I had no clear command, so I knelt down and said, “May Your holy will be done in
my regard. Do with me, Jesus, as You please.” (36) At that very moment, I felt as though I
were all alone, and various temptations attacked me. But I found peace and light in earnest
prayer, and I understood that the superior only wished to test me.
1649 I don‟t know how this happens, but the room in which I have been lying has been very much
neglected. Sometimes, it has not been cleaned for more than two weeks. Often, no one
would light a fire in the stove, and so my cough would get worse. Sometimes I would ask to
have a fire lit, and at other times I did not have the courage to ask. On one occasion, when
Mother Superior [Irene] came to see me and asked me if perhaps it was necessary to heat
the room more, I said, No, because it was already getting warmer outside, and we had the
window open.
1650 First Friday. When I took the Messenger of the Sacred He4art into my hand and read the
account of the canonization of Saint Andrew Bobola, my soul was instantly filled with a great
longing (37) that our Congregation, too, might have a saint, and I wept like a child that there
was no saint in our midst. And I said to the Lord, “I know Your generosity, and yet it seems
to me that You are less generous toward us.” And I began again to weep like a little child.
And the Lord Jesus said to me, Don‟t cry. You are that saint. Then the light of God
inundated my soul, and I was given to know how much I was to suffer, and I said to the Lord,
“How will that come about? You have been speaking to me about another Congregation.”
And the Lord answered. It is not for you to know how this will come about. Your duty is
to be faithful to My grace and to do always what is within your power and what
obedience allows you to do…..
1651 + Today one of the sisters came into my room and said that such-and-such a sister was very
fussy over her own illness, and that she found this very annoying and would gladly give her
piece of her mind were it not for the fact that she was not a member of this convent. I
answered that I was surprised that she should even think in such a way: “Sister, just think of
how many sleepless nights this sick sister has been through and of how many tears…..” The
sister than came to think differently.
+
(38) J. M. J.
1652 Adore, my soul, the mercy of the Lord,
O my heart, rejoice wholly in Him,
Because for this you have been chosen by Him,
To spread the glory of his mercy.
His goodness no one has fathomed, no one can measure,
His compassion is untold.
Every soul that approaches Him experiences this.
He will shield her and clasp her to His merciful bosom.
Happy the soul that has trusted in Your goodness
And has abandoned herself completely to Your mercy.
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