Billy Bunter's Benefit By Frank Richards - Friardale

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Billy Bunter’s Benefit By Frank Richards There was a cash-box on the table. Already there were several halfcrowns in it. Peter Todd had just arrived with another. “From Quelch!” he announced. “Good old Henry!” exclaimed Bob Cherry. “Is he coming to the show tomorrow? We shall have to pull up our socks, with Quelchy’s eye on us.” Peter grinned. “No, he said he was sorry he couldn’t be present, on account of the Masters’ Meeting in the afternoon. But be took a ticket, to help on the show.” “I say, you fellows—.” “Shut up. Bunter.” “Look here, this is my benefit, ain’t it?” exclaimed the fat Owl warmly. “I jolly well think—.” “Kick Bunter, somebody,” said Johnny Bull. “Beast!” “Wibley says Quelch must be an ass to attend a Masters’ Meeting, when he could come and see ‘Hamlet’ in the Rag,” went on Peter, with a chuckle. “Ha, ha, ha!” “I say, you fellows—.” “Hallo, hallo, hallo! Here’s Mauly! Trickle in, Mauly!” roared Bob Cherry, as the elegant figure of Lord Mauleverer appeared in the doorway. “You want the best seat! We have them! What?” Lord Mauleverer ambled in, as Peter Todd went out. “Half-crown or five bob, Mauly?” asked Frank Nugent. “A bloated millionaire ought to be good for five bob.” “A benefit performance, you know, Mauly,” said Harry Wharton. “All the brilliant galaxy of talent in the Remove Dramatic Society.” “And a good cause, more or less,” said Johnny Bull. “We’re doing this to keep a fat diddler from getting sacked for diddling.” “Ha, ha, ha!” “Oh, really, Bull—.” “Sold many guinea seats?” asked Lord Mauleverer. There was a chuckle in No. 1 Study. Guinea seats were rather in the nature of a flourish of William Wibley’s imagination. Wibley thought it looked well. But the most optimistic member of the Remove Dramatic Society did not expect any Greyfriars man to cough up twenty-one shillings for a seat. “Not so far,” said Harry Wharton, laughing. “If there’s going to be a rush for the guinea seats, it hasn’t started yet.” “The rushfulness will probably not be terrific,” remarked Hurree Jamset Ram Singh, with a dusky grin. “Well, look here, suppose I start the ball rollin’, what?” asked Mauly. And Page 140 of 161
Billy Bunter’s Benefit By Frank Richards he laid a pound note and a shilling on the table. “Good man!” “Hear, hear!” “By gum! I shall have to write out a special ticket for that,” said Bob. “Wait a minute, Mauly.” “I say, you fellows—.” “Shut up, Bunter! Here you are, Mauly.” ‘Sold many guinea seats?’ asked Mauleverer. Lord Mauleverer ambled out with his special ticket, Frank Nugent picked up the shilling and clinked it into the cash-box. At the same moment, a fat paw reached for the pound note. Rap “Yarooooh!” roared Billy Bunter, as a ruler, in Johnny Bull’s hand, established sudden contact with a set of fat knuckles. Bunter sucked fat knuckles and spluttered frantically, Nugent picked up the pound note and slipped it into the cash-box. “Look here, you beast—!” roared Bunter. “Roll away, barrel. We’re busy.” “Ow! wow!” Bunter, sucking fat knuckles, glared at the Famous Five. “Look here, this is my benefit, not yours. I can jolly well take charge of the cash if I like! See?” “And where would it go?” asked Bob. “That is my business, when it’s my benefit!” hooted Bunter. “You jolly well Page 141 of 161
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