Billy Bunter's Benefit By Frank Richards - Friardale

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Billy Bunter’s Benefit By Frank Richards “I’m pretty certain your paper’s better than Linley’s,” went on Bunter. “And you needn’t bother about Linley—who’s Linley, anyhow? No need to worry about him, that I can see. We’re old pals, ain’t we, old fellow? You let me have your Latin paper, and that three guineas is mine, and—and—— —.” “You fat, frabjous, frumptious, footling fathead!” said the captain of the Remove, in measured tones, “I won’t let you have my Latin paper, for two reasons—first, it’s against the rules for one fellow to do another fellow’s paper —second, I haven’t done the paper yet, and I’m not going to.” “Oh, really, Wharton—.” “So that’s that,” said Harry. “Now roll away, like a good barrel.” “I don’t think you ought to tell whoppers, Wharton, just to get out of helping a fellow out of a hole—.” “What?” roared Wharton. “I jolly well know you’ve done your Latin paper. It’s a bit thick telling fibs about it,” said Bunter, scornfully. “I’m surprised at you, Wharton! You make out that I tell whoppers. Well, what about you?” “You—you—you!” gasped Harry Wharton. “Don’t tell any more fibs, old chap! It’s rather mean,” said Bunter. “Look here, can I have that paper?” Harry Wharton breathed hard and deep. Why Bunter supposed that he had already done his Latin paper, he could not begin to guess. He had got no further than copying out a section of one of Virgil’s eclogues, with the idea of studying that great poet in the pastoral style, when the idea had been given up. But Billy Bunter, evidently, believed that he had done the Latin paper, and that he was prevaricating on the subject. “You won’t want it now,” urged Bunter. “Just let me have it, and—and don’t say anything about it, of course. Can I have it, old chap?” “I tell you I haven’t even touched the Latin paper!” howled Wharton. “And I tell you that I jolly well know you have,” howled back Bunter, “and I think it’s jolly mean to keep on telling crammers about it, and I can jolly well say plainly—yow-ow-wow!” Harry Wharton did not appear disposed to argue the point with Bunter, as to whether he had been telling “crammers” or not. He grasped the fat Owl by a fat neck, and sat him down in the quad, hard. Then he walked on with his friends, leaving Bunter sitting and spluttering. “Oh! Ow!” gasped Bunter. “Beast! Ow!” Billy Bunter resumed the perpendicular, casting a devastating blink after the Famous Five. Seldom had Bunter felt so indignant and aggrieved. Page 98 of 161
Billy Bunter’s Benefit By Frank Richards He could see no reason whatever why a fellow who was standing out shouldn’t let him have his Latin paper. True, it was against the rules: but what did the rules matter, in comparison with Billy Bunter’s pressing need of cash? But Wharton denying that he had done the paper at all really put the lid on—telling crammers, just to get out of doing a fellow a good turn! Bunter couldn’t help feeling very contemptuous about that. He jolly well knew that Wharton had done that paper. Not only had he seen it on the table in No. I Study, but he had looked at it, blinked at it, construed it so far as he could understand it, and hidden it under the study carpet, to give the beast the trouble of doing it over again! So what was the use of Wharton saying that he hadn’t done it at all? Bunter had rather expected a fuss to be made about that missing paper. But nothing had been said about it. No doubt that was because Wharton had given up the idea of entering for the prize. It was, as far as Bunter knew, still under the study carpet, where he had shoved it out of sight the previous day. Wharton, obviously, didn’t want it, Yet he wouldn’t let Bunter have it! “Beastly dog-in-the-manger!” breathed Bunter, as he rolled back to the House. “Well, if he doesn’t want it. I’m jolly well going to have it, I know that!” Bunter’s fat mind was made up on that point. Wharton had done a paper for the prize—a jolly good paper, as far as Bunter could judge. It was a sheer waste to leave it where it was! Billy Bunter was going to have that Latin paper! He rolled into No. 1 Study. He jerked back the study carpet, and blinked eagerly under it. There was the paper, just where he had shoved it. Bunter grabbed it up. He rolled out of No, 1 Study with his prey crumpled in a fat hand. Grinning with triumph, the fat Owl rolled on to his own study. Peter Todd and Tom Dutton were at the nets with the other Remove cricketers, and Bunter had his study to himself. He banged the door, and sat down at the table. He had Wharton’s paper. But even Bunter’s limited intelligence made him aware that it was of no use in Wharton’s hand-writing. Bunter proceeded to copy it out in his own sprawling fist—little dreaming that he was copying out verses which, so far from having been written by a Remove man of Greyfriars, had been celebrated for a couple of thousand years! Their celebrity had not reached Bunter’s fat ears: and he had no doubts. From “Forte” to “parati” Bunter industriously wrote out the lines which Page 99 of 161
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Billy Bunter's Benefit By Frank Richards - Friardale

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