The Health bulletin [serial] - University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill

Januarij, 1927 The Health Bulletin 11
POINTS ON CHILD BEHAVIOR
BEING A PROPER PARENT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT JOB ANY
OF US HAS
By LAWSON G. LOAVREY, 3I.D.
Director, Child Guidance Clinic No. 2, National Committee for Mental Hygiene
[We have never published a more interesting- and instructive article, especially to
teachers, children and parents, than this from the Mental Hygiene Bulletin. We wish
to urge every teacher to first read it through carefully, and then send it in turn to
the parents of every child in the grade, with the special request that they read and ask
themselves the questions Doctor Lowrey so pertinently propounds.—Editor.]
^
1. Do I Cause My ChiJd To Be Kervoitsf
2. Do I Cause My Child To Disobey
3. Do I Cause My Child To Hare
Temper Tantrums
4. Do I Cause My Child To Be Dishonest
5. Do I Frighten My Child .9o He
Becomes Timid And Fearful
Most parents \yould promptly answer
"no"' to all the above questions and
would resent the implications contained
in them. Yet child-guidance
clinics and physicians and psychologists
who make a special study of
behavior problems in children are
constantly encountering situations in
which parents are clearly responsible
for just such reactions in children. Of
course, no intelligent and thoughtful
parent deliberately sets out to do such
things, but even the most intelligent
often do not consider all the angles of
the problem involved in the relationships
of parent and child. The result is
that the parent is all too frequently
the direct cause of distressing behavior
in the child.
In the following columns, remedies
as well as preventive methods are discussed
; but one should remember that
it is easier to prevent the development
of unhealthy behavior than it is to
correct it.
1. "Nervousness"'
Do I Cause My Child To Be Nervous
By
: Being nervous myself Telling
him about it so I may have his sympathy
Constantly reminding him how
nervous he is Telling other people in
his presence how nervous and queer
and odd he is Worrying over his
health and habits Worrying him with
my worries over him Coddling him
p/hysically and mentally Denying him
independence of thought and action
Expecting too much from him and
driving him all the time
// You Think Yo^lr Child Is Nervous,
First Be Sure Of Yourself
From early infancy some children
are "nervous."
They are fussy, irritable
babies ; delicate, sensitive, easily upset
children ; they become easily flustered,
excitable adults. Such children demand
the utmost in placidity and patience
from their parents.
Most "nervous" children are, however,
the product of the management
given them. Their parents do some or
all of the things listed above: Nervous
parents expect, and so cause, nervous
children. They constantly remind the
child of this. In their own nervousness
they set an example, and it usually
is imitated. They communicate their
worries to the child, who increases
them many fold. They cannot permit
the child to lead a life of his own,
and either push him to the extreme
limit, or do all the thinking for him.
Cultivate calmness. Do not fuss at
the child. Give him peace ; an opportunity
to do things and learn for himself.
Use j'our common sense ; recall
your own childhood ; be patient and
kind. Settle your worries in some other
way than by passing them on to the
child. Know your child ; his interests
and capacities ; his weaknesses and
strong points. Above all, be yourself as
calm and peaceful as you can. If you
have any of the habits or attitudes
listed above, change them.