Notes from the Dream (circa 1982-1986) - Stephen H. Wolinsky Ph. D.

It was not until much later after many yearsof psychotherapy that I realized how the littleboy and internalized father dominated my lifeand created my inner voice which projectedonto the world my internalized dad with all hisand society’s rules and standards (how to beappropriate and fit-in), and, I had remained thelittle boy.The awareness of that interaction and its effectfollowed me like an unwelcomed guest.I had come to realize years later that theinternalized dad, (with all his be good andget good things, (which were societal valuesand rules like be loving, kind, forgiving,obedient etc.) had unknowingly been fusedwith the “observer” or inner” witness”, Laterthese values which had been taken on were“spiritualized”, (made spiritual).This silent inner observer or inner witness alsowas fused with an internalized parent whichwatched me play the role, the act, the gameof life, and judged and evaluated what hadhappened, how I had doneothers reactions andThis silent inner observer or inner witnesswhich had also been fused with an internalizedparent watched, futurized and rehersed a planon how to prepare for future circumstances.This convoluted observer or witness later,unknowingly became spiritualized.19