Notes from the Dream (circa 1982-1986) - Stephen H. Wolinsky Ph. D.

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Once again however I was drawn againsomehow to a golf-ball sized bubble. I gazed inand was fascinated to see a man and a womanmaking love. As I gazed deeper into the bubble,I felt an immense shock passing through“me”—it was “my mother and father” some 35years earlier. The edges of the bubble becamemore and more permeable like a membraneand I fell into a universe that seemed almostoverwhelming.Some part of my consciousness was floatingover these two bodies. Another part could feelas though I was in both my parents genitalssimultaneously. The friction created by themotion of his penis against the walls of mymother’s vagina could only be overshadowedby the deep sense that they were trying toplease each other.Suddenly, like a rocket being launched I feltan impact as I witnessed an explosion: anexplosive orgasm like an ignition. Somethingwas formed, but what it was I didn’t know. Iwas suddenly connected and inside somethingthat was breathing.Where was I now? “Inside” or “outside”? Itwas as though when this explosion-ignitionoccurred, I was given some kind of instinctiveapparatus that I was surrounded by and it51
knew exactly what it was supposed to do.This apparatus was machine like, but soft.It vibrated and somehow was forming quiteindependent of “me” it’s feelings and who itwas.As I was able to step out of what I realizedwas a body-mind consciousness of a cellularstructure, I could witness “from above” whatwas occurring. Once again, I was able to rememberthe bubble universe and the edges ofthis world and see them as transparent.Most importantly, as the “world” wastransparent the emptiness the bubble floated inwas revealed.As I witnessed this, (what I later realized wasan embryo), it took great effort to pull myattention away from the embryo, to pull myattention away from the baby in “my mother’sbody”. Somehow, I had become interested, noobsessed with this fetus.It seemed that the more I became interested inthe baby and what was happening, the more Ibecame the baby. The less interested I became,the less attracted, and the more I could un-bethe baby.With great effortI focused on the empty stillness. Almost as52
Page 2 and 3: NotesFromThe DreamCirca 1982-1986Or
Page 4 and 5: DedicationTo NityanandaTo Sri Nisar
Page 6 and 7: “We are such stuff that dreams ar
Page 8: A Historical StoryAbout the TextIn
Page 11 and 12: as well as the extreme difficulty i
Page 13 and 14: The Dream YogaPart IFrom the Six Yo
Page 15 and 16: I felt like what Martin Heidegger h
Page 17 and 18: I had spent my life-time trying to
Page 19 and 20: An “I” which believed wholehear
Page 21 and 22: Deep downI could not believe in the
Page 23 and 24: accepted, and be loved.The problem
Page 25 and 26: The dreamWithinTheDreamIIIThey are
Page 27 and 28: enabling me to feel nothing at all
Page 29 and 30: say what I was feeling without inte
Page 31 and 32: The dreamWithinTheDreamVJacque Derr
Page 33 and 34: self-actualization contained within
Page 35 and 36: I felt like I was in a place over h
Page 37 and 38: The dreamWithinTheDreamVII“Every
Page 39 and 40: uised images that had been created,
Page 41 and 42: Lying there facing what I perceived
Page 43 and 44: of time and motion. I truly could n
Page 45 and 46: The dreamWithinTheDreamIXThe Not-I-
Page 47 and 48: ubble enquiring “Who am I?” was
Page 49 and 50: I became aware of the “emptiness
Page 51: The dreamWithinTheDreamXBuddhism: A
Page 55 and 56: The dreamWithinTheDreamXIThrough th
Page 57 and 58: ecause as the emptiness there was n
Page 59 and 60: Yet, it was clear that everything w
Page 61 and 62: ackground of the emptiness along wi
Page 63 and 64: Unexpectedly in the distance there
Page 65 and 66: In one Quantum-bubble-realm which a
Page 67: In one bubble the concept of the ob
Page 70 and 71: comes into your awareness, the ques
Page 72 and 73: actually did not exist outside of a
Page 74 and 75: A bubble called what will the futur
Page 76 and 77: I began to just want the bubbles to
Page 78 and 79: A thought arose “Where is your bo
Page 80 and 81: Why?“I” realized that with each
Page 82 and 83: The dreamWithinTheDreamXVIII“Ever
Page 84 and 85: I spent what seemed like years in t
Page 86 and 87: My story was that Spiritual Paths e
Page 88 and 89: As the Not-I-I state looked “back
Page 90 and 91: “Consciousness is emptinessEmptin
Page 92 and 93: (whatever THAT was).In this way wit
Page 94 and 95: The dreamWithinTheDreamXIXTHE HEART
Page 96 and 97: Next:appreciate that “your heart
Page 98 and 99: The second chakra is about four fin
Page 100 and 101: You might even hear a clap of light
Page 102 and 103:
were like rays of the sun getting m
Page 104 and 105:
And, that each bubble universe I en
Page 106 and 107:
She continued, “Feel your body ag
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Meditate: Visualize the elements (a
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The dreamWithinTheDreamXXIIIThe Voi
Page 112 and 113:
Consciousness is the basic substanc
Page 114 and 115:
He continued reading and then speak
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meditation bubble-realm. Remaining
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ubble-realms that arose and subside
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etween state the Buddhists called t
Page 122 and 123:
Then:The explicate perceivable worl
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more aware of.Soon I was drawn into
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the ocean, like closing the eyelids
Page 128 and 129:
space in an attempt to get to their
Page 130 and 131:
The dreamWithinTheDreamXXVIThe I am
Page 132 and 133:
space, mass, and time of the explic
Page 134 and 135:
and associations and our feeling of
Page 136 and 137:
I began to wonder, what am I missin
Page 138 and 139:
The dreamWithinTheDreamXXVIII“Eve
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The dreamWithinTheDreamXXIXDristi S
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which appeared gave the illusion of
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Awareness as the lens or veil can b
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Through the lens of awareness the e
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The dreamWithinTheDreamXXI“There
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Surround the cremated body with “
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this Bohm called the explicate orde
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The “perceived” concept called
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The Eight Negations of NagarjunaThe
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The Emptiness Bubble:The emptiness
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It was a “light” that lie betwe
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“Everything has Buddha nature.”
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nucleus then there was between the
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Waking DreamsIIIShiva Sutras: “Th
Page 168 and 169:
Waking DreamsIVThe Vijnana Bhairava
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Waking DreamsVThe Shiva SutrasConte
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Once again the “I” label vanish
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There is no witness and there is no
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Waking DreamsVIIIWithout eyesWithou
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Emptiness means withoutNirvana is w
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the voidness of voidthe nonexistent
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This accounts for the germination o
Page 184 and 185:
Waking DreamsXThe “I” label dis
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(nature), which too was nonexistent
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The “I” was an illusion!Even if
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What’s left is not even the aware
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Waking DreamsXIIThe Not-I-I state a
Page 194 and 195:
Waking DreamsXIIIThe enfolding and
Page 196 and 197:
Waking DreamsXIV“Nothing is.” N
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See the dream as consciousnessSee t
Page 200 and 201:
The perceiver or knower of the void
Page 202:
THE ENDOf THE NON-LINEARTHE STORY20
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Notes from the Dream (circa 1982-1986) - Stephen H. Wolinsky Ph. D.

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