The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F_ck

In each scenario, the person is either taking responsibility
for problems/emotions that are not theirs, or demanding
that someone else take responsibility for their
problems/emotions.
In general, entitled people fall into one of two traps in
their relationships. Either they expect other people to take
responsibility for their problems: “I wanted a nice relaxing
weekend at home. You should have known that and
canceled your plans.” Or they take on too much
responsibility for other people’s problems: “She just lost her
job again, but it’s probably my fault because I wasn’t as
supportive of her as I could have been. I’m going to help her
rewrite her résumé tomorrow.”
Entitled people adopt these strategies in their
relationships, as with everything, to help avoid accepting
responsibility for their own problems. As a result, their
relationships are fragile and fake, products of avoiding inner
pain rather than embracing a genuine appreciation and
adoration of their partner.
This goes not just for romantic relationships, by the way,
but also for family relationships and friendships. An
overbearing mother may take responsibility for every
problem in her children’s lives. Her own entitlement then
encourages an entitlement in her children, as they grow up
to believe other people should always be responsible for
their problems.
(This is why the problems in your romantic relationships
always eerily resemble the problems in your parents’
relationship.)
When you have murky areas of responsibility for your
emotions and actions—areas where it’s unclear who is
responsible for what, whose fault is what, why you’re doing
what you’re doing—you never develop strong values for
yourself. Your only value becomes making your partner
happy. Or your only value becomes your partner making you
happy.