emmanuel reynaud holy virility the social construction of masculinity

which the possibility of such an event causes him, as there is
little risk that he will be forced into being sexually used, and,
likewise, he can easily choose not to realise that this danger
hangs permanently over the lives of all women, whatever their
age and physical appearance.
In most cases rape seems to man ―if he does admit that it
exists― as an experience whose traumatic effect should not be
exaggerated. In general it does not seem to him that being raped
is a particularly unusual thing for a woman since rape is not so
far removed from men's habitual sexual practice: 'Of course, I
understand it's not very pleasant but what do you expect! When
you have no choice, it's best to give in: after all it's just a nasty
few minutes to get through . . . ' Actually, even when he does
not rape, man is still obsessed with imposing his wishes and
controlling the relationship; the way he makes love is an
illustration of this and gives a good indication of the form his
sexuality takes. Man is sexually inhibited: when he 'makes love',
he does not let himself get carried away by the experience of
two bodies meeting, but simply gets into 'position' and lives out
his fantasies.
[Man and sexuality / 51]
Conjugal rights have given birth to the 'primary Western
position' or the 'missionary position', in which the man is on top
of the woman, crushing her with his weight: the advantage is
twofold, the woman has no choice and it stops her from moving
too much if necessary. As soon as he wishes to relieve himself,
he mounts her, opens her legs so he can then hump to his
heart's content; it does not usually take him very long and, his
business completed, he sinks down heavily. But that is the
crude version; there is also the classy lover. This one has read
books and knows about eroticism. When he has it off, it is not
simply a question of mere release, like going to the lavatory, but
of carrying out the great ritual of Love. He also prefers the on
top position since it enables him to exhibit his expertise in
controlling the situation. He indulges in a few gymnastic
movements and little rhythmic exercises ―above, below, front,
back . . . one, two, three, four, five. Then he comes back to the
initial position to give the final thrust. He can see his power
reflected more clearly as his partner's body convulses under his
assaults. For a change, man can suggest, the woman can get on
top of him: thus he can satisfy himself without too much
exertion, something he considers he deserves after a hard day
at work.
And while he is arranging his body in precise and codified
positions (the Kama Sutra being no doubt the most famous
catalogue of this kind), man does not let his mind relax and
wander: he makes it work.
[52 / Holy virility]
One of the commonest of man's fantasies is probably that of the
'ultimate possession'. Man can pursue this as far as murder