emmanuel reynaud holy virility the social construction of masculinity

«Nathalie put her finger on it that time. Jack is doing it on
purpose. Only he doesn't realise it. He expresses his
resentment of Nathalie eloquently with his phallus. The
results are hard on her but easy on him. He has regular and
frequent intercourse, with an orgasm every time. Nathalie
hasn't had an orgasm (except when she masturbates) for
almost ten years. The smile is characteristic of men with
premature ejaculations― they are all profusely apologetic,
but their regrets have a hollow ring.» [8]
[68 / Holy virility]
To the sexologist's way of thinking, premature ejaculation does
not mar man's pleasure, except, of course, through his
disappointment in not satisfying the woman. Masters and
Johnon are categorical: «Ιt is evident that man's sexual
inadequacy is not related directly to his ability or inability to
attain orgasmic release of sexual tensions. Psychosocial
influences certainly create clinical states of male sexual
inadequacy, but rarely are they directed specifically toward the
orgasmic experience.» [9] This is hardly surprising, given the
confusion of ejaculation with male orgasm: what does it matter
when or how it comes, as long as it comes! All the same, it is
surprising and somewhat disconcerting that men like Reuben
and Masters, have such a limited knowledge of their own
bodies: either they have never had an orgasm, or they have
never had a premature ejaculation; but in any case, they should
be better informed, for, whatever they may say, the man who
ejaculates rapidly rarely achieves orgasm.
Premature ejaculation is, in fact, a common form of male
frigidity, and is easy to define once it is described with
reference to man: it is simply premature in relation to the
development of his pleasure. Reich depicted this with a curve:
at the beginning, over-excitement, then a slight protrusion of
pleasure corresponding to ejaculation, and finally descent
through displeasure back to neutrality. Even if one has never
experienced it directly nor through a lover, it is fairly easy to
imagine what happens to the body during premature
ejaculation: the mind crammed with fantasies and fears, man is
sometimes so tense and over-excited that he can no longer
control the restricted area to which he confines his sexuality.
Mind and penis levelled at the target, he does not let the sexual
energy spread through his body, and at the first contact with the
moistness of the vagina, it soon overflows: the energy is
released in the ejaculatory reflex. A few little convulsions shake
the hips and it is quickly over; man has only to fall asleep or
apologise.
Man does not generally feel premature ejaculation as his οwn
non-satisfaction, he usually realises that it is a problem through
his partner's frustration. He does not try to relax to enable
pleasure to be diffused through his body, on the contrary he
endeavours to exert an even more stringent control over
himself. So, the traditional 'cures' concentrate on everything
that can desensitise the penis, and chase erotic fantasies from