9502320 Comp English I Ja06 - JMap

Anchor Part B — Paper Practice – Part Paper B—Level – A 5 – B
Anchor Level 5 – B
Quality
Meaning
Development
Organization
Language Use
Conventions
Commentary
The response:
Conveys a thorough understanding of the documents, explaining that manatees are affected by
the oftentimes reckless things humans do. The response makes clear and explicit connections
between the information and ideas in the documents and the assigned task, noting that humans
must take responsibility for their actions as well as correct this massive problem.
Develops ideas clearly and consistently, using relevant and specific details from the documents
to discuss human factors that contribute to the endangerment of manatees (90 percent of
manatees … have been afflicted with scars from boats and people have destroyed manatee
habitat), steps that have been taken to alleviate the problem (three hospitals … care for
wounded manatees ), and drawbacks of each effort (expensive undertaking).
Maintains a clear and appropriate focus on the problem of the manatee. The response exhibits a
logical sequence of ideas, first acknowledging the problem, then addressing its causes
(proliferate use of high-speed water crafts) and current solutions (law suits), and ending with an
appeal for action. Transitions are appropriately used (If even thirty, Thankfully, Other steps).
Uses language that is generally fluent and original (could ever replicate, deaths have escalated,
marine mammals), with evident awareness audience and purpose (our actions affect the world
in lasting ways), but sometimes lapses into personal asides (Math is not a virtue of mine and
Math whiz or not). The response varies structure and length of sentences to control rhythm and
pacing (Unfortunately, getting support in this movement is not a simple task).
Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (measely, legistically,
rediculous), use of the hyphen (collision induced, human caused, seventy five), and use of
prepositions (on total and $30,000 a year in each manatee’s food) that do not hinder
comprehension.
Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 5, although it is somewhat weaker
in conventions.
[64]