Anna Karenina - LimpidSoft

PART FIVE CHAPTER 15
There was something shameful, effeminate, Capuan, as he called it to himself, in his
present mode of life. “It’s not right to go on like this,” he thought. “It’ll soon be three
months, and I’m doing next to nothing. Today, almost for the first time, I set to work
seriously, and what happened? I did nothing but begin and throw it aside. Even my
ordinary pursuits I have almost given up. On the land I scarcely walk or drive about
at all to look after things. Either I am loath to leave her, or I see she’s dull alone. And
I used to think that, before marriage, life was nothing much, somehow didn’t count,
but that after marriage, life began in earnest. And here almost three months have
passed, and I have spent my time so idly and unprofitably. No, this won’t do; I must
begin. Of course, it’s not her fault. She’s not to blame in any way. I ought myself to
be firmer, to maintain my masculine independence of action; or else I shall get into
such ways, and she’ll get used to them too.... Of course she’s not to blame,” he told
himself.
But it is hard for anyone who is dissatisfied not to blame someone else, and especially
the person nearest of all to him, for the ground of his dissatisfaction. And it
vaguely came into Levin’s mind that she herself was not to blame (she could not be
to blame for anything), but what was to blame was her education, too superficial and
frivolous. (“That fool Tcharsky: she wanted, I know, to stop him, but didn’t know
how to.“) “Yes, apart from her interest in the house (that she has), apart from dress
and broderie anglaise, she has no serious interests. No interest in her work, in the estate,
in the peasants, nor in music, though she’s rather good at it, nor in reading. She
does nothing, and is perfectly satisfied.” Levin, in his heart, censured this, and did
not as yet understand that she was preparing for that period of activity which was
to come for her when she would at once be the wife of her husband and mistress of
the house, and would bear, and nurse, and bring up children. He knew not that she
was instinctively aware of this, and preparing herself for this time of terrible toil, did
not reproach herself for the moments of carelessness and happiness in her love that
she enjoyed now while gaily building her nest for the future.
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