Tales of Old Japan - Maybe You Like It

Confucius, it is written, "The hen that crows in the morning brings misfortune."
In our own literature in the Jusho (Book of the Gods), "When
the goddesses saw the gods for the first time, they were the first to cry
cut, 'Oh! what beautiful males!' But the gods were greatly displeased,
and said, 'We, who are so strong and powerful, should by rights have
been the first to speak; how is it that, on the contrary, these females
speak first? This is indeed vulgar.'" Again it is written, "When the gods
brought forth the cripple Hiruko, the Lord of Heaven, answering, said
that his misfortune was a punishment upon the goddesses who had presumed
to speak first." The same rule therefore exists in China and in
Japan, and it is held to be unlucky that the wife should take precedence:
with this warning people should be careful how they commit a breach of
etiquette, although it may be sanctioned by the vulgar.
At the wedding of the lower classes, the bride and her ladies and
friends have a feast, but the bridegroom has no feast; and when the
bride's feast is over, the bridegroom is called in and is presented with the
bride's wine-cup; but as the forms observed are very vulgar, it is not
worth while to point out the rules which guide them. As this night is essentially
of importance to the married couple only, there are some
writers on ceremonies who have laid down that no feast need be prepared
for the bride's ladies, and in my opinion they are right: for the husband
and wife at the beginning of their intercourse to be separated, and
for the bride alone to be feasted like an ordinary guest, appears to be an
inauspicious opening. I have thus pointed out two ill-omened customs
which are to be avoided.
The ceremonies observed at the weddings of persons of ordinary rank
are as follows:—The feast which is prepared is in proportion to the
means of the individuals. There must be three wine-cups set out upon a
tray. The ceremony of drinking wine three times is gone through, as described
above, after which the bride changes her dress, and a feast of
three courses is produced—two courses of five dishes and one of three
dishes, or one course of five dishes, one of three, and one of two, according
to the means of the family. A tray, with a representation of the island
of Takasago, is brought out, and the wine is heated; sweetmeats of five
or seven sorts are also served in boxes or trays; and when the tea comes
in, the bridegroom gets up, and goes to rest himself. If the wine kettles
are of tin, they must not be set out in the room: they must be brought in
from the kitchen; and in that case the paper butterflies are not attached to
them.
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