978-1572305441

182 A MIND APART
She lacked the motivation to communicate, and her interests were severely
restricted, intense, and highly sensory in nature. In addition to
the delays caused by the deprivation, I believed she had autism,
although it was difficult to sort out which delays in development were
due to autism and which due to deprivation. Who knows what neurological
damage was caused by the first three years of her life spent in the
orphanage? Is it possible for extreme forms of deprivation to cause autism,
perhaps in some children who have a genetic risk for the disorder?
There are now reports of children from Romanian orphanages presenting
with types of autism. It’s not inconceivable that in the context of
genetic vulnerability the biological insults brought about by lack of
food and human touch could be one of the factors causing autism in
this child. This is not to say that autism can be caused in the typical circumstance
by “bad parenting”; what Sophie experienced was extreme
deprivation, malnutrition, and lack of touch, factors known to cause
changes in the brain and to influence social behavior in laboratory animals.
One cannot generalize from Sophie’s history to the vast majority
of children with autism in developed countries.
I took a deep breath and tried to explain all this to Greg and
Marianne. What I wanted to say was that Sophie did not have autism
and that their act of compassion and bravery would be rewarded by a
healthy child who would eventually “catch up” if they continued to
stimulate and support her. But I knew this was probably not true; the
autism was an added burden over and above the early deprivation. Life
was going to be even more difficult than they had bargained for during
that conversation over the phone. I expected them to be devastated by
the news, at the prospect that there would be a limit to Sophie’s recovery.
In fact, to my surprise, they were relieved. So often my apprehension
at communicating bad news turns out to be misguided. Marianne
and Greg reasoned that at least Sophie’s lack of progress was not due to
their failure to love and nurture her. A heavy weight had been lifted.
Now at least there was a reason Sophie pushed them away and refused
to enter their world. It had a name, and they could get on with the next
phase of their lives, dealing with the autism.
* * *
I have followed Sophie’s progress with interest over the years. Here
was an opportunity, I thought, to learn about how parents come to
terms with having a child with ASD. The process was all the more dra-