The Spinster and Her Enemies - Feminish

WOMEN’S FRIENDSHIPS AND LESBIANISM
The feminist historians who have been uncovering these
relationships have assumed that they were devoid of genital
sexual expression on the grounds that the repression of women’s
genital sexuality in the nineteenth century would have made
spontaneous genital expression unlikely. Whether or not these
women expressed themselves genitally there is no doubt that
physical excitement and eroticism played an important part in
their love. This is clear from the way Sophia Jex-Blake describes
her relationship with Octavia Hill in the following quotation
from her diary of 1860. The two women are negotiating the
spending of a holiday together:
Told Octa about Wales,—sitting in her room on the table,
my heart beating like a hammer. That Carry [Sophia’s sister]
wanted to go to Wales and I too, and most convenient about
the beginning of July, so… ‘Put off my visit?’ said Octa.
‘No, I was just going to say…if you wish to see anything of
me, you must come too, I think and not put off the mountains
until heaven.’ She sunk her head on my lap silently, raised it
in tears, and then such a kiss. 5
It is not a platonic peck on the cheek which is being described
here. On the grounds of the absence of genital contact alone,
some contemporary feminist writers have sought to establish a
clear distinction between these passionate friendships, even in
the case of spinsters like Jex-Blake and Hill who were in
passionate friendships with women all their lives, and
‘lesbianism’. 6 Such a distinction is very difficult to draw. The
conventions which govern the expression of erotic love may
change, but the emotions and the physical excitement may have
felt the same.
Today intense emotional and sensual interaction between
women friends in the West is not seen as socially acceptable.
Faderman illustrates this change with an experiment which was
carried out at Palo Alto High School in 1973:
For three weeks the girls behaved on campus as all romantic
friends did in the previous century: They held hands often on
campus walks, they sat with their arms around each other,
and they exchanged kisses on the cheek when classes ended.
They expressly did not intend to give the impression that
their feelings were sexual. They touched each other only as
close, affectionate friends would. But despite their intentions,
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