2011 - Talk Birth

she enjoyed our company so much that she couldn’t stand to have us away from her all day at school. It
wasn’t until adulthood that I fully realized that she probably could have used the ”break” school would
have provided, but she homeschooled us because of her own convictions that it was in our best interest
and that the public school system was a ”broken” one to which she was philosophically opposed. As a
teenager, I did catch on to some of these convictions and would passionately advocate for homeschooling
when encountering those who would express skepticism or doubt (this is what I mean about having ”used
up” this energy already).
My dominant memories of my childhood years consist mainly of playing with my sister, reading, and
having my mom make things for us. My youngest siblings are 9 and 11 years younger than I am and do not
feature prominently in my childhood memories. My other sister is 22 months younger than I am and our
lives together are so inextricably linked that I rarely speak about my childhood without using the pronoun
”we.” We spent so much time playing. It was the bulk of our day really, just playing with each other. We
were each other’s best friend. We played outside, we played with toys, we made toys, and played some more.
We had neighbors (loosely speaking—within five miles from us) who were also homeschoolers and we saw
and played with them frequently as well (and, grew up to be bridesmaids in each other’s weddings). With
our friends, we often played house, restaurant and yes, school. We made all kinds of worksheets for our
dolls and I was always the teacher. At home, we sometimes did worksheets with mom. Almost every year
she bought ”Super Workbooks” for us (i.e. ”My Third Grade Super Workbook”) and we’d start off with a
bang with her saying that this was the year when we were really going to buckle down and do school every
day. This usually lasted a couple of weeks and we’d be back to our freeform, playing days with occasional
bursts of workbooks as we expressed interest in them. We had old-fashioned readers like Dick & Jane that
were always fun to read, as well as lots of other schoolbooks in addition to the Super Workbooks. These
were always available to us on the bookshelf if we wanted them. I learned to read when I was three and
have been a voracious reader ever since. We would go to the library once a week and I would check out
every new book they had.
Because of my tendency to read until my eyes glazed over, my mom eventually limited me to reading
two books a day (full-length ”chapter books” such as Trixie Belden—favorites of mine when I was about
6). I literally read every single book in the children and youth sections at both local libraries. A lot of
my learning truly came from fiction. I still feel like my most long-lasting lessons about history came from
American Girl books! We also used to get all kinds of educational magazines. Mom also read to us every
night until we were in our early teens, usually book series like Narnia. We were in 4-H for many years
and did all kinds of projects through 4-H, went to summer camp, and eventually participated in their
many leadership-opportunity programs. I’ve never forgotten the mock trial of the ethically and morally
complicated case of Nancy Cruzan we participated in at the state Capitol building through the 4-H civic
leadership program I took part in. We belonged to the local homeschool support group and regularly went
to homeschool bowling, skating, and other events. My mom also did a ”craft club” for girls and we would
get together and make craft projects every week. We also had lots of sleepovers.
Unlike many other homeschoolers of the time, we did not homeschool for religious reasons and in
fact were not religious at all. I felt a barrier throughout my childhood in relating authentically to other
people because I was not religious—it felt like something I needed to play close to the chest and keep ”secret.”
Many of my friends were fundamentalist Christians, which was not compatible with my own burgeoning
sense of social justice and women’s rights. My own self-identification as a feminist was my first taste of
activism and my first involvement with a ”cause” (other than homeschooling). I had many experiences
with my homeschooled peers that left a very bad taste in my mouth towards religion, primarily religious
attitudes toward women, to the extent that I maintained a knee-jerk almost anti-religious response to any
discussion of religious or spiritual issues until I was close to 30. As a child and teenager, I came to feel like
being religious and being feminist were fundamentally incompatible and I chose feminism. I truly did not
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