2011 - Talk Birth

Barbara (2011-09-30 15:29:45)
At least we can visit via the occasional text message........and, personally, I like never getting ”done”, because then I’m
never bored!
Lynda M O (2011-09-30 18:22:50)
Yes, indeed it is great that they play so well together and seem to truly enjoy each others’ company. Your life is full
of all kinds of Awesome and the molded clay will come in a few years. Sounds like you are doing fine. A LOT and
fine, too.
Hope (2011-09-30 22:13:38)
You are getting A LOT done in a day! I can’t believe you’re second guessing that you should be doing more- I’m tired
just from reading it. And thanks for linking to me. :)
1.10 October
Rebirth: What We Don’t Say (2011-10-02 19:24)
A new self did emerge. This is what women do not tell each other. I want to say it here:
You will die when you become a mother and it will hurt and it will be confusing and you will be
someone you never imagined and then, you will be reborn. Truthfully, I have never wanted to
be the woman I was before I had children. I loved that woman and I loved that life but I don’t
want it again. My daughters have made me more daring, more human, more compassionate.
Their births have brought me closer to the earth and they have helped me pare my life down to
its essentials. Writing, quick prayers, good food, a few close friends, many deep breaths, love,
plants, dancing, music, teaching-these are the ingredients of my/this new self. I waited for this
new self in the dark, in the bittersweet water of letting go, in the heavy heartbeat of learning to
be a mother, against the isolation, I grew and emerged laughing and crying and here I am, sisters
and brothers. [1]Rebirth: What We Don’t Say | The Sage Mama.
One of my favorite songs to listen to after my miscarriage experiences had a refrain of, ”it is dark, dark,
dark inside.” While previously not connecting to ”darkness” as a place of growth or healing, during these
experiences I learned that it is in the darkness that new things take root and grow.
As I’ve shared before, one of my favorite quotes about postpartum comes from Naomi Wolf, A mother
is not born when a baby is born; a mother is forged, made. The quote I shared above from this ”Rebirth”
article touches that place in me—that motherhood results in a total life overhaul and a new, enriched identity.
(This article also made me think of first postpartum journey which I wrote about [2]here.)
In a [3]previous post, I wrote the following about the idea that giving birth and mothering leaves permanent
marks:
I’ve also come to realize that despite the many amazing and wonderful, profound and magical things about
birth, the experience of giving birth is very likely to take some kind of toll on a woman—whether her body,
mind, or emotions. There is usually some type of “price” to be paid for each and every birth and sometimes
the price is very high. This is, I guess, what qualifies, birth as such an intense, initiatory rite for women. It
is most definitely a transformative event and transformation does not usually come without some degree of
challenge. Sometimes to be triumphed over or overcome, but something that also leaves permanent marks.
Sometimes those marks are literal and sometimes they are emotional and sometimes they are truly beautiful,
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