2011 - Talk Birth

• If you have relatives coming to help after the baby is born, make sure they know that their job is to
take care of you and the house while you take care of the baby. It is not acceptable for you to be fixing
meals and sweeping floors while grandma “helpfully” rocks the baby—it needs to be vice versa!
• Prepare your partner and anyone else in your support network that you will be Queen for a Month
and let them know what you will need from them (also, get it fixed in your mind that being Queen is
okay!).
• Expect to be “nursing all day long.” It is okay and good for you both (10-14 nursings in 24 hours is
perfectly normal and acceptable!).
• Encourage your partner to take as much time off as possible—either saved up vacation time or unpaid
FMLA time. He can benefit from an extended period of cocooning with his newborn too!
• Explore the idea that postpartum can be a time of postpartum expression rather than postpartum
depression—letting all of your emotions flow, expressing your needs clearly and assertively, and being
aware of and accepting of your continuum of feelings are ways to be expressive. (This concept comes
from the excellent, but little known book Transformation Through Birth by Claudia Panuthos.)
• Plan a few special things for yourself—have a little present for yourself to enjoy during postpartum
(a new book, good magazine, postnatal massage, whatever is self-nurturing and brings you pleasure.
Personally, I do not encourage TV or movie watching because it can become a passive time filler that
distracts you from enjoying your babymoon. Some people may include favorite films as their enjoyable
postpartum activities though).
• As postpartum stretches on, if you experience decreased libido, it is okay to honor and accept that.
Planning for a restful, nurturing, “time out” with your new baby is way to honor this new stage in your
family’s life cycle and a way to honor yourself as a woman and mother. I hope you will create space in your
life for a time in which vulnerability is accepted. Postpartum is a time of openness—heart, body, and mind.
I hope your experience is one of tenderness and joy.
Molly Remer, MSW, ICCE, CCCE is a certified birth educator and activist. She is editor of the Friends
of Missouri Midwives newsletter, a breastfeeding counselor, and the mother of two young sons and a baby
girl on the way. She loves to write and blogs about birth at [2]http://talkbirth.wordpress.com, midwifery at
[3]http://cfmidwifery.blogspot.com, and miscarriage at http://tinyfootprintsonmyheart.wordpress.com.
This is a preprint of Planning for the Postpartum Period an article published in The Journal of Attachment
Parenting Volume 11, Issue 1, pp 28-29. Copyright © 2008 Attachment Parenting International. API’s
website is located at: [4]http://www.attachmentparenting.org.
1. http://talkbirth.files.wordpress.com/2011/01/smallmollylannandzander.jpg
2. file://localhost/mnt/ext/blogbooker/tmp/
3. http://cfmidwifery.blogspot.com/
4. http://www.attachmentparenting.org/
Tweets that mention Planning for Postpartum « Talk Birth – Topsy.com (2011-01-22 11:28:52)
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Crystal Di Domizio, ConfidentMotherdoula. ConfidentMotherdoula said:
though this is an american blog there is some lots of common sense tips! http://fb.me/DLyT3kgD [...]
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