My Battle with Merkel Cell Cancer

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testament to his strength. That he is having trouble enjoying the early days of his release
from the hospital is not surprising.
He is scheduled to see Dr. Flam again on Friday, March 23. They will likely schedule a
PET scan at that point. Dad saw no point in doing a PET scan earlier -- if it was good
news and the chemo worked, he wouldn't be strong enough for another round yet
anyhow. If it was bad news, learning it earlier wouldn't be helpful either. The esophageal
biopsy that was done in conjunction with the removal of the original stent showed dead
and dying tumor cells, so there is some objective evidence that the chemo worked. The
closure of the esophagus after removal of the first stent and the new pain are of concern
to dad. So we live with a couple of weeks of uncertainty. There is some thought that the
left pleural pain may be pneumonia-related, so there may be some intervening diagnostic
tests.
I wish there was some positive note I could conclude on, but it eludes me. It was three
weeks ago yesterday that my dad went to the ICU, and so it has been three weeks since
the reality of what is going on has solidified. If dad gets to feeling well enough to have
some normal days, I'm sure he will take advantage of them. The appeals aren't yet
exhausted either, and nobody refuses a pardon.
Footnotes:
1. From Wikipedia's description of the Sword of Damocles: The Damocles of the
anecdote was an obsequious courtier in the court of Dionysius II of Syracuse, a fourth
century BC tyrant of Syracuse, Italy. Pandering to his king, Damocles exclaimed that, as
a great man of power and authority surrounded by magnificence, Dionysius was truly
extremely fortunate. Dionysius then offered to switch places with Damocles, so that
Damocles could taste that very fortune first hand. Damocles quickly and eagerly
accepted the King's proposal. Damocles sat down in the king's throne surrounded by
every luxury, but Dionysius arranged that a huge sword should hang above the throne,
held at the pommel only by a single hair of a horse's tail. Damocles finally begged the
tyrant that he be allowed to depart, because he no longer wanted to be so fortunate.
Dionysius had successfully conveyed a sense of the constant fear in which the great man
lives. Cicero uses this story as the last in a series of contrasting examples for reaching
the conclusion he had been moving towards in this fifth Disputation, in which the theme is
that virtue is sufficient for living a happy life.
Posted by Gary Shuster at 02:20PM (-07:00)
I'm Still Alive
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
The events of the past 6 weeks or so have brought me close to death but failed to do me
in. Although my head is not as clear as it was, I will attempt to recount my brushes with
the grim reaper.
About 5 11/2 weeks ago, sleeping on my recliner, I needed to get up, for some reason. I
was sedated with a phentonyl patch. I remember losing my balance, getting up and then
falling head first into the glass door to the back of the house. Helped back onto the
recliner, I slept the night, with a lump the size of a lemon on my forehead. Herb Boro
called Judy the next morning and asked if there was anything he could do. He came to
the house and immediately he and Judy took me to the hospital.
I was admitted with no platelets and no white blood cells, low hemoglobin. A CT scan
showed no intracranial bleeding but I am sure I had a concussion. A blood culture
My Battle with Merkel Cell Cancer