Introduction to Mindfulness - Dean Amory

You are walking down the street and someone from a program you’d
attended walks towards you on the other side of the street. You are
happy too see this person and you had a good relationship with them
when you both went through the program together. As they walk
towards you, they appear to be looking in your direction, but they
keep walking on and don’t acknowledge in any way that they see you.
After listening to this scenario, each person was invited to write down
whatever thoughts had passed through their minds as they imagined
themselves in that situation. Also to note down any feelings they may
have had. This exercise demonstrated how rapidly or “automatically”
we make interpretations of routine everyday events (mostly without
ever being aware that we are doing this) and how our emotional
reactions are powerfully affected by the interpretations we make. The
group mostly jumped to very negative conclusions and felt badly
within themselves that the person across the street had chosen to
ignore them. Their thoughts “seemed true” but as they each shared
their experience of this exercise, they group began to realise that in
any given situation, many interpretations are possible:
- “If someone gives you a compliment you can be embarrassed,
angry, happy. The key is your interpretation, not the stimulus”
- “You don’t call out to them either (the person ignoring you), you
don’t check reality, I suppose it’s a self-obsession thing”
- “It’s funny, if it happens to someone else I can see it’s irrational, I
like to think that I’m more impartial, that I have distance,
perspective”
The value of mindfulness in helping to become aware of our
automatic thoughts was discussed. If we could somehow catch
ourselves as we were becoming pulled into some familiar negative
interpretation of an event, we might be able to pause and change how
we react, instead of being pulled into some self-defeating behaviour
that may start us down the slippery slope to relapse.
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