Awareness in Buddhist Meditation

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is the food on which the ‘I’ gores. True compassion lies in the total
surrender of that concept of separation, which is the ‘I’.
Even when we recognise a problem as a conflict, the mind finds
pleasure in attempting to solve it. We do not want a solution, but
we derive intellectual pleasure or spiritual enjoyment in the attempt
at solution. Once we have solved a cross-word puzzle, the fun is
gone; but we enjoyed meeting the challenge. The problem, once it
is solved, has no further interest, for there is no further stimulus to
action, which is the source of pleasure, because it is only in action
that the ‘self’ can assert itself. The prospect of winning a prize is
too remote to be effective. Thus it can be seen why people like to
postpone final deliverance, why they find excuses for not living here
and now, why they imagine that our present Buddha-Dhamma is
insufficient, so that rebirth will be necessary under the dispensation
of Maitri Buddha and his Dharma. We do not want a solution, but
we want to play chess, to play about with the pieces of life, matching
the power of religion (the bishop) against that of the state (the
castle), or escape round the comer with a horse, sacrificing a pawn
here and there to protect our vested interests (the King and Queen).
And thus we move about in a real of idealism, of symbolism and of
pitiful pride, postponing the moment of disillusionment, because we
fear the void of the understanding of life without self.
When we come across sorrow and suffering, we see them as forces
which play against us, and so our whole play of life is now directed
to the overcoming of opposition. We feel that opposition when ideals
are being frustrated. But we also visualise it, when we see the
sorrows and the problems of others. That arouses a feeling of compassion,
that is, a feeling together, suffering together. But, unless
it is an understanding together, this feeling of pity may be just a
transfer in which the image of sorrow is being transferred from the
other to myself. Then I feel the sorrow of others, because I have
put myself in their place. Such substitution cannot bring about a
solution. It may be soothing for the other to know that there is