Unexpected Freedom

Unexpected Freedomand one of the ways the Buddha encouraged us to becomemore focused in our efforts is to think about our death andwhat’s it going to be like.I have a very good friend who lives in a rest home inNewcastle. She was independent until the age of ninety-seven,but in the past three years has retired to a home where shereceives nursing care. She was telling me recently, “I reallyfeel for the other people in this home. Most of them haven’tprepared themselves for being here.” She sits in a room,pretty much all day long, peacefully preparing for dying.Every time I go to see her she says, “I was preparing to dielast night.” She describes how on occasions she has wokenaround three in the morning filled with a sense of aweassociated with a perception of vast, free, edgeless awareness.On starting to open her eyes, or on moving physically, sheobserved a collapsing or a limiting of this awareness. Fromthis experience, she says, she has developed a practice oflearning how to inhibit this movement of contraction andto dissolve back into edgelessness, which is how sheimagines dying will be. We have often talked about it in acalm and clear manner. She manifests a genuine innercontentment. I could see that she felt real pity for the peoplewho distract themselves watching television all day long. Shetends not to get involved in the various activities that arearranged for people living in the home. She feels that deathis too important for her to be distracting herself with suchthings. So most of the time she happily stays in her room.She reads the Dhammapada and one or two other Buddhistbooks. She meditates and contemplates dying. I find this agreat inspiration. When I read ‘Happiness arises from havingaccumulated virtue by life’s end,’ I sometimes think whatthe alternative is – the terrible sadness that arises when yourealise your lot. The image the Buddha gave for somebody190