Unexpected Freedom

Unexpected Freedomdoesn’t mean to say that we are a failure. We don’t have tobecome a failure because we are experiencing the perceptionof failure. We may fear humiliating ourselves in public, butwithout mindfulness we can really get caught up in that fear.With mindfulness we can feel the feeling of fear ofhumiliation; or even feel really worthless and disrespectedand allow it to be – allow it to highlight the next step we needto take towards freedom or balance.Learning from CriticismI received a letter today from a young monk I know who iscurrently living out in Asia. He wrote that his whole practicethese days is just to feel what it feels like to be totallydisrespected. He’s living in a situation where he’smisunderstood, where people are not supportive of him, andyet he’s committed to staying there for the three months ofthe vassa. He can’t get out! He’s not starving or goingwithout, but it is humiliating him. In his letter he writes withequanimity and clarity, “My practice is just learning what itfeels like to feel disrespected.” This is not a situation that onewould set up for anybody, but learning how to feel what itfeels like to be disrespected will be invaluable. If he becomesa respected monk and teacher, he will undoubtedly receive alot of praise, with people telling him how wonderful he is;but there will be well-informed mindfulness of what it feelslike to be respected. He won’t get so lost in being respected.So it is with praise and blame. When people blame andcriticise us, we can ask ourselves what it feels like to bemindful of blame and criticism. If someone praises us,telling us how wonderful we are, we may lose our sense ofproportion. They butter us up, we buy into it and then theycan manipulate us, and we feel conned and used. We don’t40