Unexpected Freedom

Facing the ConsequencesMeeting our AngerSometimes, after we have experienced an outburst ofpassionate rage, and the fires have subsided, we just go on todistract ourselves, trying not to think about it any more. Thatapproach to dealing with our faults does not work. Thereason we have become caught up in anger in the first place isbecause there is something in us we have not yet recognised.At such times we can also go against the inclination toavoid what we are feeling and instead turn towards it andfully receive it. Something within us might fear that to do sowill involve the risk of being taken over by it. It is true thatwe need to approach this task sensitively and skilfully, butwith right practice we can equip ourselves with the ability tofully face the consequences of our heedlessness. Thoseconsequences are painful. If we are consistent and nonjudgemental,these same painful feelings gradually give usthe message that to allow ourselves to follow this energy, nomatter how tempting it appears, leads to making thingsworse. We are losing out. When we begin to get a feeling forthe integrity of this practice we become more willing to opento our weakness. Having survived the humiliation of losingour composure, we can afterwards stop and reflect and get tothe point of acknowledging with humility, ‘I actually lost itthere, didn’t I? – I got caught up in the heat.’It can be helpful at this point to mentally rerun thedrama. I might notice that the fire gets stirred up in the belly,and because I miss it there, it continues upward and invadesmy heart, then my head and then starts coming out throughthe mouth. Just this kind of contemplation can prepare us,so that next time we are about to be swept away in afirestorm, we remember ourselves. We can recall whathappened the last time we followed the passion, and this77