BEHAVIORAL SCIENCES - Universitatea de Medicină şi Farmacie

about what they are going to say next (the latter case is particularly true in
conflict situations or disagreements).
Active listening is a structured way of listening and responding to
others. It focuses attention on the speaker. Suspending one’s own frame of
reference and suspending judgment are important in order to fully attend to
the speaker.
When we listen effectively we gain information that is valuable to
understanding the problem as the other person sees it. We gain a greater
understanding of the other person's perception. After all, the truth is
subjective and a matter of perception. When we have a deeper
understanding of another's perception, whether we agree with it or not, we
hold the key to understanding that person's motivation, attitude, and
behavior. We have a deeper understanding of the problem and the
potential paths for reaching agreement.
Active listening involves and an effective attending which is a
careful balance of alertness and relaxation that includes appropriate body
movement, eye contact, and "posture of involvement". Fully attending
says to the speaker, "What you are saying is very important. I am totally
present and intent on understanding you". We create a posture of
involvement by:
- Leaning gently towards the speaker;
- Facing the other person squarely;
- Maintaining an open posture with arms and legs uncrossed;
- Maintaining an appropriate distance between us and the speaker;
- Moving our bodies in response to the speaker, i.e., appropriate
head nodding, facial expressions.
When we pay attention to a speaker's body language we gain insight
into how that person is feeling as well as the intensity of the feeling.
Through careful attention to body language and paraverbal messages, we
are able to develop hunches about what the speaker (or listener) is
communicating. We can then, through our reflective listening skills, check
the accuracy of those hunches by expressing in our own words, our
impression of what is being communicated.
Providing feedback is the most important active listening skill.
Ask questions. Nod in agreement. Look the person straight in the eye.
Lean forward. Be an animated listener. Focus on what the other person is
saying. Repeat key points. Active listening is particularly important in
dealing with an angry person. Encouraging the person to speak, i.e., to
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