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it is lovingly caressed hundreds of times everyday. The pistol was spotlessly clean, with just theright hint of oil which a weapon in constant useshould have.I smelt the barrel. It had the faint smell of cordite,a dead giveaway that it had been used recently.“Kuki,” said I sternly, “You have used your pistolrecently!”“Yes, Sir ! I carry it with me all the time. I fired ittwice last week and maybe four times the weekbefore that.”“Are you aware that you have to send a reportto headquarters each time you fire your pistol?I have not seen any report from you! Instead, Ihave a complaint here that you have been usingyour pistol for shooting pigs and hunting in theforest. What do you have to say?”Kuki was quiet. I looked at Nogen Singhmeaningfully, as if to say “Tamoh, now watchhim tell a lie.”Kuki remained quiet for some more time andthen, looking quite perplexed, he asked, “Sir,why do I have to send a report? You have issuedme the pistol for use, have you not?”“Look Kuki, I don’t have the time to go into allthis; but the complaint here says that you shootpigs and villagers with it. What the hell have youbeen doing?” I almost yelled.“Yes, Sir, I do shoot pigs with my pistol,” saidKuki. “Sir, whenever I have to kill a pig, I don’tslaughter him with a ‘dao’ the way commonvillagers do. With a ‘dao’, the pig makes such amess. No, Sir. I shoot him! I call all the villagers,including the Gaon Burhas, to my house. I makethem stand in a circle around the fenced area infront of my house”.“And then what do you do?”“Sir, then I hoist our national flag and makeeveryone salute it.”“Good. Then what do you do?” I asked.“When they have all saluted the flag, Sir, I let thepig loose. The fenced area is quite small, Sir; justabout twenty feet by twenty feet. When the pigstarts running, Sir, I shoot him. Sir One pig. Oneshot, Sir!” said Kuki proudly.“And then what do you do?”“Oh! The whole village then has a feast!”I was speechless.“Sir, you said someone had complained. Who isthis blankety blank who has complained?”I winced. Not so much at the use of the expletiveby a junior official before his senior, but at thevehemence of his outrage.“Look Kuki, this complaint is from some Soithang,a pseudonymous complaint no doubt. But theallegations, by your own admission are correct.”“Oh ho ! That bloody Soithang ! He is a no good,Sir,” declared Kuki. “Last month, I missed oneshot and the ricocheted bullet grazed his temple.Just because of that he complains to the ADSahib!” Kuki was almost apoplectic.“Grazed his temple, you said?” I tentativelysought confirmation but hoped that I had notheard correctly.“Yes Sir. It was just a slight graze and it stoppedbleeding after only two days. I told Soithang’swife to put the special mud from the river bedon the wound and he became ok in less than aweek. I really don’t understand why Soithangshould have complained,” said Kuki, lookinggenuinely perplexed and hurt.“Don’t you understand? Half an inch this side andthis fellow would have been dead!” I shouted.“I agree, Sir, but half an inch that side and thebullet would have missed him completely. Don’tyou agree? ”I agreed but quickly realized that somewhere inthis exchange; I had already lost the argument.So I changed tack.“But why do you need to call the whole village?”I asked.With all the righteous indignation at hiscommand, Kuki said, “Those Gaon Burhas thinkthey are so important! Why, some of them aremuch younger than I am. No one becomes wiseThe Indian Police Journal, October - December, 2012, Special Issue 51