Burlesques William Makepeace Thackeray

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of my hancisters) had conquered at Hadjincourt & Cressy; and I gave him a pair of new
velveteen inagspressables, with two and six in each pocket, as a reward for three score
years of labor. Fitzwarren, my man, brought them forrards on a satting cushing. Has I sat
down defning chears selewted the horator; the band struck up 'The Good Old English
Gentleman.' I looked to the ladies galry; my Hangelina waived her ankasher and kissd her
&; and I sor in the distans that pore Mary Hann efected evidently to tears by my ellaquints."
"What an adwance that gal has made since she's been in Lady Hangelina's company! Sins
she wears her young lady's igsploded gownds and retired caps and ribbings, there's an
ellygance abowt her which is puffickly admarable; and which, haddid to her own natral
bewty & sweetniss, creates in my boozum serting sensatiums . . . Shor! I MUSTN'T give
way to fealinx unwuthy of a member of the aristoxy. What can she be to me but a mear
recklection—a vishn of former ears?
"I'm blest if I didn mistake her for Hangelina herself yesterday. I met her in the grand
Collydore of Bareacres Castle. I sor a lady in a melumcolly hattatude gacing outawinder at
the setting sun, which was eluminating the fair parx and gardings of the ancient demean.
"'Bewchus Lady Hangelina,' says I—'A penny for your Ladyship's thought,' says I.
"'Ho, Jeames! Ho, Mr. De la Pluche!' hansered a well-known vice, with a haxnt of sadnis
which went to my art. 'YOU know what my thoughts are, well enough. I was thinking of
happy, happy old times, when both of us were poo—poo—oor,' says Mary Hann, busting
out in a phit of crying, a thing I can't ebide. I took her and tried to cumft her: I pinted out
the diffrents of our sitawashns; igsplained to her that proppaty has its jewties as well as its
previletches, and that MY juty clearly was to marry into a noble famly. I kep on talking to
her (she sobbing and going hon hall the time) till Lady Hangelina herself came up—'The
real Siming Pewer,' as they say in the play.
"There they stood together—them two young women. I don't know which is the ansamest. I
coodn help comparing them; and I coodnt help comparing myself to a certing Hannimle
I've read of, that found it difficklt to make a choice betwigst 2 Bundles of A."
"That ungrateful beest Fitzwarren—my oan man—a feller I've maid a fortune for—a feller I
give 100 lb. per hannum to!—a low bred Wallydyshamber! HE must be thinking of falling
in love too! and treating me to his imperence.
"He's a great big athlatic feller—six foot i, with a pair of black whiskers like air-brushes—
with a look of a Colonel in the harmy—a dangerous pawmpus-spoken raskle I warrunt you.
I was coming ome from shuiting this hafternoon—and passing through Lady Hangelina's