Volume 1 Whops and Clobber R Humphries - The Woody Back to ...

Whops and Clobber
During her first three years at the school she
also gained a reputation as an unruly pupil. The
school teaching staff was far too genteel to actually
punish the students and operated a system where
undisciplined pupils were ‘Put on the Menu’. Girls on
the menu were required to report before the school’s
prefectorial body known as the Posh. After being
charged the miscreants were given the opportunity to
either plead guilty as charged, make a plea bargain to
a lesser charge, or to defend themselves. The Posh
had a variety of punishments at their disposal
including lines, detentions, community service and the
elimination of privileges. They were also permitted to
sentence girls to be thrashed with a ceremonial cane
known as the ‘popping stick’.
Deborah appeared on the menu with
increasing frequency and despite her reputation as a
skilled and articulate advocate in her own defense she
was thrashed twenty-five times during her first three
years at the academy.
Her fourth year was a catastrophe with her
behavior spiraling out of control and she made a
record-breaking number of appearances on the menu.
Despite her silver tongue and deft defenses the odds
were stacked against her and predictably she
established another record receiving nineteen
beatings during the period. Coincidentally the
President of Posh who was responsible for
administering the thrashings was Pauline Gascoigne
who would later take on the role of Economics Dame
at the Woody Back to School Unit.
This pattern of misbehavior caused the
Principal of the academy to take extreme action.
Deborah was summonsed to the Great House for a