Volume 1 Whops and Clobber R Humphries - The Woody Back to ...

Whops and Clobber
Dames. Deborah had gently sweet-talked the pony
across the grass, terrified that any second an
innocent glance from a lighted window would expose
her. Her luck held and she reached the dark safety of
the entrance to the science lab. She opened the door
and led the pony into the laboratory. She passed
through the entrance lobby and went into the
chemistry room. Gently she stroked the animal and
whispered sweet nothings. She fed it sugar and then
laid out some hay at the back of the room and hung a
feeding bag around its neck.
She kissed the pony gently. "Be quiet now,"
she pleaded, "be a good horsy and go to sleep."
The pony appeared to be content to munch on
its food. Deborah patted her again and slowly moved
away. She backed out of the door, her heart
thumping. Suddenly there was an almighty crash of
breaking glass and the pony let out an ear-shattering
neigh. Deborah's heart missed a beat, she rushed
back into the room, the pony neighed again and then
promptly dropped her load on the floor. Deborah
stared incredulously. She tried to calm the pony's
distress but it had worked itself into a frenzy. She had
shattered the glass in the front of a cabinet and
kicked several stools across the room, making them
good for tinder wood.
Deborah's mind was racing. She had to think of
something, the cacophony of whinnying and breaking
furniture was doubtless audible clear across the quad.
The smell of equine defecation was becoming
sickening. Deborah snatched up a rag from a sink and
blindfolded the pony. Slowly the distressed animal
responded to the hapless gal’s desperate entreaties.
Shaking its head twice and blowing through its