TANTRIC-QUEST-Encounter-with-Absolute-Love

You open your eyes for a moment, and a wave of infinitegratitude comes over you, and then you're plunged againinto this awakened sleep.Each time my eyes opened, Devi's eyes opened too. Inthe moon's glimmer, I saw her dark look, enlarged by thecloseness of our faces. There was always a sort of fundamentalsmile in her. Her ash-covered body warmed me incredibly.I felt a vital circulation of energy. By breathingher in, I seemed to experience neural pleasure, orgasms inthe eyeballs simultaneous with an intense humming in theskull, which spread to the coccyx and the soles of the feet.It was then that I felt the internal heat of the yogis.By morning, after these magical nights, I felt very muchlike an animal, like a young bear coming out of hibernation,full of strength and life. Our play at the waterfall hadthe festive air of a big parade. This approach of a love thatdoesn't rely on a single emotional fantasy and that seemscapable of expanding endlessly is one of the most powerfulshocks in the Tantric sadhana. It is love without the restrictionsor the extreme tensions of passion, without manipulation,without the anguish of continuity, of possession byor of the other. It is a love that ceases to be taken or given,in order to be overwhelmed by the divine.One day, as we were drying ourselves in the sun on ourlarge, flat, warm rock, I began to think for the first time oflife after Devi - of my return to the Western world, of howI was going to survive the separation. I then had the experienceof seeing how, in a matter of seconds, this singlethought reduced the ecstatic field on which I was living. Ifelt as if my whole body and consciousness were shrinking,as if I'd been plunged into the head-shrinking liquid of the156