ness is the place of ritual union. Consciousness is the placeof samadhi. Consciousness is the Awakening. Consciousnessis the dwelling place of the gods. Consciousness istime. Consciousness is space. Consciousness is the jar, thevessel out of which flows the divine."What does the worshiper do? He cleans the temple.How? By asking all who have been sitting there forever toleave so he can sweep, throw fresh water drawn from theriver on the stones, scatter rose petals. Very quickly, theworshiper takes count of those sitting in his consciousnesswho refuse to leave the temple. Why? Because, like us,they are afraid. It is because of fear that the consciousnessremains cluttered. Not the little fears, easy to define, notthe fear of this or that, but the great fundamental fear, whichis the fragile terrain on which we construct all our dreams,and which, one day or another, paralyzes us and destroyswhat we have constructed <strong>with</strong> so much care."The day to act arrives. You purify yourself by bathing inthe sacred river. You feel alive and full of determination.You draw fresh water, take a broom, gather a basket ofrose petals, and enter the temple of the consciousness. Thatis meditation: to enter fresh, the mind alive and alert inthe temple of the consciousness. You see them, all seated,immobile, anchored in the ground, fossilized. They havebeen there for such a long time. They have loved you somuch, given you so much, spared you so much. Since youwere very young, their voices have guided you. Even now,at this moment, as they watch you enter, ready to clean,freshen, and scent, they talk to you and you listen: 'Listen,this is what we think of you. Since you were young, we'vebeen trying to keep you from danger, to warn you of life's43
pitfalls. We punish you when you make a mistake, but whenyou listen to us, when you are a good boy, we reward you,we sing your praises, and, thanks to us, you haven't comeout too badly. Now then, don't chase us away. Keep listeningto our voices, following our advice. We only want what'sbest for you. Freedom? It's chaos. Listen to us closely, followthe way we show you, and all will go well.'"But in this instant, you know that you have listened toomuch, that these stone-colored men are there only to keepyou from scattering the roses and the fresh water. That allis not going so well. You are like two fears face-to-face.Like two fears finding themselves nose-to-nose in a darkforest, full of creaking and cracking and other frighteningsounds. One fear says to itself, 'Let's hope that he doesn'tdo anything to eject us from the temple!' The other fearsays to itself, 'Let's hope they don't get up to go out! Whatwould become of me <strong>with</strong>out them!' And like that, day afterday, one compromises <strong>with</strong> the consciousness, receivesblame and encouragement, falls into line, and becomessomeone for whom grayness is acceptable. All of societyadores the monochrome of gray. Gray is the most widespreadcolor. There are millions of varieties. Gray is theideal color for social camouflage. It is thanks to our graythat we manage to exist socially, to merge into the immensecauldron of suffering and ordinary violence."Devi sensed that this suffering, this "ordinary" violence,elicited strong feelings in me. She fell silent and gave me aprobing look. Letting the thread of my thought unwind,she seemed to touch each loop. I had the impression thatshe listened into my silence. This suffering and violencewere the reasons for my being here. I wanted to try to put44
- Page 4 and 5: TANTRICQUESTAn Encounter withAbsolu
- Page 6 and 7: For Kalou Rinpoche and Devi,my mast
- Page 8 and 9: INTRODUCTIONShivaic Tantrism of Kas
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The next day, there was a fundament
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stopped myself as soon as I realize
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extended to the trees, the stones,
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your whole body is loose, center on
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of his sincere affection and of his
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longer operating. I discovered, sim
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continuation - continuation of the
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no ritual to induce the meditative
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with you. When you exhale, the whol
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"That conflicted with my determinat
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"And when one leaves meditation, ho
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thing with a man obsessed with sex
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opportunity for impulsive debaucher
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as cream. Then Devi asked the ricks
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cardboard shelter. I didn't sleep.
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would be practicing soon. I asked h
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to the coccyx. Our dance became ext
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14Devi opened the bottle of bhang a
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powerless in their terrifying light
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of consciousness onto the same plan
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orgasm without erection, and I susp
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times, she succeeded in making me c
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16Devi asked me to go find an armlo
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we've imprisoned by our desire. We
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sacrificial meal. Then you perfume
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the night will collect our pleasure
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17The twelve days that followed wer
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During these wonderful days, I expe
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facing a potential disciple is not
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"Between two breaths, there is a co
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18We spent two or three hours a day
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young virgin, but powerful as a sno
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Jivaro Indians. And this time, it w
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the moment when you were opening yo
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each, she put them carefully into m
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20In the days that followed the mai
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the void. Distinguishing between wh
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ecome terrifying. Let yourself be.
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sary goods up to Devi, Ram smiled,
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day after day, and sometimes consum
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overwhelmed me. My heart opened as
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sit on a comfortable cushion or on
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It's enough to be attentive. Usuall
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Practice will change our perspectiv
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ing each internal organ and setting
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