TANTRIC-QUEST-Encounter-with-Absolute-Love

shimmering in the morning light. The smell of incense enteredthe cottage. I went to bathe in the icy water of theriver. I read and reread the Vijnanabhairava Tantra andpracticed assiduously and regularly to the point of reachingthat state again that I had known at the end of my firstyear of continuous practice - that state in which one desiresonly one thing: to remain in meditation for hours,unmoving, as if fixed in the center of space; full of warmth,energy, openness; breathing deeply, regularly, and silently -the mandala, constructing itself before you as if projected,each detail intensely present, the mantra flowing like a river,the phases of absorption following from one anothersmoothly until the final void.I used this particularly beneficial period for practicingguru yoga and for visualizing Vajradhara, the Tibetan divinitywho represents the spiritual master and whose bluebody appeared effortlessly, framed in empty space, facingme. For the first time, I succeeded in practicing dream yogaregularly. This form of yoga allows one to become consciousof dreams and to enter meditation, thus replacing the dreamwith the mandala or directly with non-dualistic contemplation.When I awakened, this meditation left a sensationof great freshness, of deep rest free of the anarchic activitiesof consciousness; the mind was lucid and open.Soon I was laughing at my frenzied Tantric quest andtasting the simple pleasure of being in this lost village,of walking and of meditating in total tranquility. KalouRinpoche had often spoken to me of the peace that comeswith abandoning effort, tension, and the desire to attainsomething. Now I experienced it daily. Each act of living- rising, drinking a cup or two of tea, eating a little,28