The Varieties of Religious Experience - Penn State University

The Varieties of Religious Experiencewithin myself, O Lord God, I am lost, and if thou, O Lord, dostnot find out some new way, I know nothing of, I shall never besaved, for the ways and methods I have prescribed to myself have allfailed me, and I am willing they should fail. O Lord, have mercy! OLord, have mercy!“These discoveries continued until I went into the house and satdown. After I sat down, being all in confusion, like a drowning manthat was just giving up to sink, and almost in an agony, I turnedvery suddenly round in my chair, and seeing part of an old Biblelying in one of the chairs, I caught hold of it in great haste; andopening it without any premeditation, cast my eyes on the 38thPsalm, which was the first time I ever saw the word of God: it tookhold of me with such power that it seemed to go through my wholesoul, so that it seemed as if God was praying in, with, and for me.About this time my father called the family to attend prayers; Iattended, but paid no regard to what he said in his prayer, but continuedpraying in those words of the Psalm. Oh, help me, help me!cried I, thou Redeemer of souls, and save me, or I am gone forever;thou canst this night, if thou pleasest, with one drop of thy bloodatone for my sins, and appease the wrath of an angry God. At thatinstant of time when I gave all up to him to do with me as he pleased,and was willing that God should rule over me at his pleasure, redeeminglove broke into my soul with repeated scriptures, with suchpower that my whole soul seemed to be melted down with love, theburden of guilt and condemnation was gone, darkness was expelled,my heart humbled and filled with gratitude, and my whole soul,that was a few minutes ago groaning under mountains of death,and crying to an unknown God for help, was now filled with immortallove, soaring on the wings of faith, freed from the chains ofdeath and darkness, and crying out, My Lord and my God; thou artmy rock and my fortress, my shield and my high tower, my life, myjoy, my present and my everlasting portion. Looking up, I thoughtI saw that same light [he had on more than one previous occasionseen subjectively a bright blaze of light], though it appeared different;and as soon as I saw it, the design was opened to me, accordingto his promise, and I was obliged to cry out: Enough, enough, Oblessed God! The work of conversion, the change, and the manifes-200